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Shinra

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I'm simply broken now... I had a long range relationship with a girl who moved to Ontario, but it turns out she moved on and went to cheat on me with someone else...And just a couple days ago she blocked and unfriended me on facebook. She left a message and said it's over and it really hit home... Now I'm just feeling really hopeless... I literally need some help and support of members of the net here. anyone have any thoughts?
 

Taochan

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Ah man, Shinra that sucks. :/ You should take time to indulge in things you like, for instance any food, movies, activities. And try to see any friends who make you happy. No matter what this is going to be difficult and you'll probably be upset for a while, but if you try to focus on this other stuff it might help a little bit.
Also, I live in Ontario so I could totally beat her up for you, only if you want.

Hang in there man.
 

Chuman

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So it hit you hard only when she unfriended you on Facebook? In all seriousness, life goes on. It sucks that she dumped you, even more so that she cheated on you, but your a cool guy and that's her loss.
 

Solar

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This is a bit of a toughy.

On the one hand, you're far apart and physical needs are there. Even simply seeing or hugging or talking to the one you care about when it's not behind a screen becomes this wanted thing. Or rather, need.

But on the other, it would be really patronizing of me to consider others' relationships 'less real' if they're long-distance in which case, emotional cheating is still cheating and hurts like a bitch. I could tell you that 'hey, turns out your girlfriend was sorta mean/stupid/w.e but I think that's worse because it implies that maybe you didn't know her as much as you thought you did. But people change, sometimes for the worst.

Really, we all struggle with the end of our different types of relationships either way but I wouldn't mourn this one if by the end of it, she became and acted how she did. The best thing to do, I think, is keep your mind off it via other activities and let the distraction slowly heal you as you live your life. Then maybe later it won't hurt as much and you can reflect on why it happened as it did, from which, you could move on. It's all your choice, in the end, but I hope what I said helped.
 

Shinra

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Ah man, Shinra that sucks. :/ You should take time to indulge in things you like, for instance any food, movies, activities. And try to see any friends who make you happy. No matter what this is going to be difficult and you'll probably be upset for a while, but if you try to focus on this other stuff it might help a little bit.
Also, I live in Ontario so I could totally beat her up for you, only if you want.
Hang in there man.
No thanks... I'm good she's a friend I'll never forget and I still don't wish her harm even after she treated me like that. it's just not me to do that

So it hit you hard only when she unfriended you on Facebook? In all seriousness, life goes on. It sucks that she dumped you, even more so that she cheated on you, but your a cool guy and that's her loss.

thanks Chihuahua...
 

Taochan

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No thanks... I'm good she's a friend I'll never forget and I still don't wish her harm even after she treated me like that. it's just not me to do that
I know, you're a good guy. <3
I'm really sorry this happened to you though.
 

Shinra

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thanks Taocha oh yeah thanks to you too Batman... it looks like Batman is also a psychologist as well as a crimefighter lol
 

Oracle Spockanort

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Oh, Shinra...Taocha gave the best advice. (and Batman has the best insight) Just try and concentrate on other things and eventually she won't even be a thought on your mind.
 

ROXAS_32

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damn that sucks. life does go on and you will meet new people. like Taocha said though you concentrate on you and do stuff you like to do.
 

Wehrmacht

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It's a woman. Obviously you liked her, but you'll move on. Just try and not mope about it. Though honestly if it was long distance it probably wasn't going to last anyway unless you two were able to visit each other regularly in the future.
 

Orion

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I had a long range relationship with a girl who moved to Ontario, but it turns out she moved on and went to cheat on me with someone else...
Not really surprising, no offence. Not a judgement of you, but if she found someone who she got along with at a similar level or ion a similar way as to how she did with you, it's easier to go with the new guy, because she actually gets to see him in person and do stuff with him. Did you have any real immediate plans to go see her? Because while it's nice to love someone from a distance, in the end it has to go further.
Also, I live in Ontario so I could totally beat her up for you.
Yeah, go slap her shit.
Just try and not mope about it.
Or at least, if you feel the need to, get it out of the way now. If you need to sob or whatever, start now and put it behind you.
 

DMrayZ

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Hey, I don't know you but I know exactly how you feel dude. I was in love with a girl once, hell, I even proposed to her And she said yes, then when she went and left me for someone else I broke me, I felt alone and worthless and just plain Bad, but fast forward a bit and it's just a memory. My point is this, Yes, it hurts, Yes it Will keep hurting, but keep your chin up, remember your friends, stay occupied, and one day it'll just be a memory, I promise.
 

stephaknee

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Or at least, if you feel the need to, get it out of the way now. If you need to sob or whatever, start now and put it behind you.

Exactly. My ex-boyfriend and I broke up on our three year anniversary (after a very on/off last year). It's been two weeks. And I still think about him and feel sad periodically (especially in the morning). We intend to be friends later on, but need to cut off communication until we are both ready for that. I'm moving on and you will, too. You just have to keep reminding yourself that you will stop feeling depressed. Do not let yourself feel hopeless.

I'm actually seeing a therapist, which helps. Have you thought about it?
 

inasuma

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Not to offend your choice in women, but she sounds like a bitch. If that's the way she ended your relationship, she's not worth it. You deserve better. And like Wehrmacht said, it's a woman; you'll get over her and move on. Do whatever moping and reminiscing you want but make sure you tell yourself to stop at some point so you can move on. She's far away anyway, so it's even easier. At least you know you won't bump into her somewhere. =)

You'll be alright bro. I've been in that situation and yeah it sucks, but things slowly get better. Talk to some friends IRL if you got 'em, or even a therapist as stephaknee mentioned.
 

KeyofEvil'sBane

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Dude, your story hits home to me. I myself am in a long distance relationship, and I am constantly thinking about this happening ( to either of us). Taocha is right, you need to take in any indulgence for a little while, both outer and inner. Feel like sleeping in, then sleep in. Have some friends she didn't like, then go hang out with them. Hang out with any friends actually, they can be the best facilitators of recovery in situations like these. also, just don't lose hope. All this means is that now you get to start a new relationship that will be easier to maintain because then you will be in the same area (I would think, at least for the start)
 

Zul

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thanks Taocha oh yeah thanks to you too Batman... it looks like Batman is also a psychologist as well as a crimefighter lol

The Batman fights his enemies with both his mind and his fists.

And his chin.

No thanks... I'm good she's a friend I'll never forget and I still don't wish her harm even after she treated me like that. it's just not me to do that
Her treating you like that definitely warrants you forgetting her and not holding her in any respect anymore.


At the same time, Jezza's statement about long-distance relationships usually holds true, so if you didn't plan to move to Ontario yourself, this outcome(although not with the method she used) is generally expected.
 

Shinra

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thanks but I was already over it by the time Taocha put up her second post...
 

Shinra

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it`s just that good advice gets me over things quicker... some people just beat others to the punch... But I am appreciative of everyone else`s support
 
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