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Fanfiction ► Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: A tale of four losers!



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Lanydx reborn

The Superior Lanydx
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Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: A tale of four losers!

By Lanydx

( Now I'm putting on hold my Jet Set Radio fan fic for something I think people here know. This is a parody of the first Crystal Chronicles for the Game Cube. The fic is meant to be funny and will focus on the game's story lightly.)

Chapter 1: So what are we doing again?



Once upon a time in the land of Um, Alamo. Yeah that's it Alamo. The many people of land needed to power giant Crystals in small villages to save their sorry skins from a dark purple mist called Miasma. Every one hundred years or something like that, the Village of KHInsider would call on four suckers to carry a bucket and travel the world to find the power source of the Crystals Mru. This task would most likely get the four people killed but if they were lucky most of them would come back alive and be heroes to their Village.

Let's meet the poor saps I mean heroes.

The bright blue sky covered the medieval Village of KHInsider. The town was well built by the giant trees that surrounded it. The forest was also close by a waterfall. Inside the gates that guarded to village was at the center a small pool full with two pillars supporting the large, blue, and diamond shaped Crystal. It protected the towns people from dying by the hands of the dark mist with it's Prue Azure Aura. The aura would usually be seen as a barrier around the village but lately the barrier was starting to shrink. That meant that it needed Mru, the liquid of the booze spirits to charge it back to it's full force.

The town had put random sixteen year old of each race to go and get the Mru.

At 7:30 all of the races of the town:The Clavats, Yukes, Selkies, and Lilties, or as they called each other out racesal spite. The dumb asses, Ugly brainy acts, Sonic the Hedgehog lovers, and Midgets finally figured out who they wanted to go.

In the Clavats distract which was the lower part of the town that had most of the shops and food carts. On top of a chair was the Clavats wise elder. He pretty much looked like every stereotypical old man in a video game. Next to him was a brown haired boy in a worn out yellow tunic, worn yellow pants, and brown shoes. His hazel eyes were closed due to him being asleep. The Elder yelled.

"Lanydx you retard wake up!" Lanydx woke up with a startle. "Bacon!" Lanydx muttered. The Elder snapped at him. "Did you even listen to what I said?" He asked.

Lanydx dazley asked. "What am I doing again?" The elder just gave him a bucket and an axe.
"Just go." The elder told him. Lanydx slowly walked away from the distract.

At the gate Lanydx were greeted by a Red robed Yuke holding a staff, a girl Selkie with blue hair, wearing a green tube top and and green Mini Skirt, and a Lilt covered in armor.

The Yuke was the first to speak. "So your coming with us? I'm Zero by the way. That's madammina the Selkie, and the midget is Lee Roy." Zero said while pointing at the two other people. Lanydx grinned. "Yep I'm Lanydx. Zero was thinking
"Dear God this guy is going to get us all killed." Madammina smiled. "Nice to meet you both." She said. Lee Roy pushed the three away to get them moving. "Come on, we will have plenty of time to act like we like each other. Let's go!" He yelled impolitely.

"Ok no need to push." They yelled. Zero thought to himself. "I'm kicking his ass later." As they walked away form their home. Lanydx stopped. "Um guys where'd the bucket go?" He asked. It was still at the Clavats's distract . Lanydx yelled. "Doh!!!"


End of chapter.

( I plan on making it allot more funnier. Hope this is better. Please R and R or tell me what you what to happen.)

Lanydx
 

madammina

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Wow... I'm in it.

First off (sorry!) I don't swear. So, I wouldn't say Dear God.

Okay... besides me. (I don't know if I can review it honestly now... I'll keep on looking stuff up and disagreeing with it.)

(cough)

THe narrative isn't very interesting. You don't have a certain flair at hte moment necessary to do a comedy fic. But Comedy is hard, so you should improve.

Check your grammar. You have some stuff unfinished quotes and odd spaces. And the shrinking text is odd.


But you did a good job outlining the game. I hadn't played it but I knew what was going on.
 

Lanydx reborn

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Yeah the text was not my falut. Sorry about that. You didn't swear that was Zero/. I'll try to make this better.
 

madammina

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Alright. so I'm adding make sure to add a separate paragraph for each new person's line.
 

Zero

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Yeah you just need to work a little on your grammar and Comedy and you will be good. Also thanks for putting me in your Fanfic.
 

Lanydx reborn

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Chapter 2:
Welcome to the Group Slave- I mean... Assistant!

Lanydx carried the bucket on his head angrily.
"Why do I have to carry the chalice!? I'm the one with the cool axe!" he shouted at the others.
"Because you're a dumbass, dumbass. If we got into a battle, you'd probably run away screaming and leave us to die! " Zero calmly explained.
"But that's not fai-"
" It's not supposed to be fair! It's supposed to be efficient and make things work out all right!" Lee Roy stated"...dumbass"
"Yeah he's right! You'll carry the chalice while we go into battle. Then while we're fighting you'll get scared and throw the chalices ...break it... and...run away!" Zero said trailing off a little at the end.
There was a short pause and everyone except for Lanydx stopped walking. The rest of the caravaners looked at each other knowingly.
Zero rushed forward to Lanydx grasping at the chalice. "On the other hand Lanydx we could use your cool axe in battle just give me the chalice and we'll continue with our journey..he he he...." Lanydx smiled smugly and began to hand Zero the chalice.
"Well I'm glad you realized my axe wa-" Lanydx paused for a second "Wait a minute You guys think I'm too stupid too carry this chalice, don't you?" Madammina looked at the D- average Clavat.
"Maybe" She said smiling suspiciously.
" You Do! You think I'm so stupiddd! That I'll just drop the chalice! Well' sir I was the top student in my balance clas-!" Lanydx tripped over a rock. The chalice fflew out of his hands!
"Does this look infected to you?" Lanydx asked as he looked at the scrape on his knee and the others jumped for the fate of their town.
" NO! But if you're not careful I'll give you something to get infected!" Madammina shouted as Zero and Lee Roy held her back.

*******************************************************

"I'm thirsty!" Lee Roy Shouted! It had been a few hours since the chalice and Lanydx incident and the sun was center sky.
"I'm thirsty! It's past noon and I haven't had my tea!!!!" Lee Roy exclaimed!
"I think I see a stereotypical old chinese man a little farther up maybe he has some tea?" Zero said. He turned his head toward the back of the caravan. "How's he doin back there Madammina?"
"GRMPH HURMPH RUMPH HARUMPH PHUMP!" Lanydx shouted!
"Just fine, Zero! Just fine!" she yelled back cheerily as she adjusted the tied up and gagged Lanydx on the back of the caravan.

*******************************************************

"Harro! Relcome toa my Shoopp! You want a da kungpao chicken???"
" UMmm No kind stereotype, we are actually in need of some tea? Do you happen to have any?" Zero asked kindly.
"Oh yes I do have fuzzy srave- I mean assistant for sare!" said the man as he pulled out a small moogle in a cage.
" Well actually sir we were looking for tea an-"
"FUZZY!?" A voice form the back of the caravan shouted. Lanydx rushed forward and grabbed the small creature from it's cage.
"How did you get untied!?" screamed Zero. "Maddamina! What were you doing back there?"
" GRMPH HURMPH RUMPH HARUMPH PHUMP?" she replied.
" Ugggh Well we can't take him sir. Thanks anyw-"
"WHAT!? We can't keep him!!?" Lanydx cried.
"Well if we do he's gonna be your responsibility, you understand?"
"Uh huh! Uh huh! I promise!"
"Well... ok.."
"YAYYYYY!"
"Well old man is there anything we should know about this thing before we go?" Zero said.
"Welr first off, don’t expose him to bright lights!" the old man stated.
"We're gonna go tanning!" said Lanydx happily as he snuggled his new moogle.
"Secondly, don't get him wet!"
"And then we'll go swimming!"
" Finawy, Don't feed him after midnight!"
" And then we'll eat waffles at one in the morning, right after midnight! Yayyyyy!"
"This seems like more trouble than it's worth..." Zero whispered to himself quietly.
"Where the hell is my tea!!!!???" Lee Roy shouted from the back of the caravan "Don't get the stupid furball get my tea!!"
" And wif evely purchase of furry sla-Assistant...you get free tea!"
" I say we buy the cute little bastard!" Lee Roy shouted.
" I still don't think we should-"
" Did I mention he's good at ...carrying chalices!" The man said with a sly smile!
" Welcome to the family...uh... uhm, Lanydx does he have a name yet?" Zero asked.
"His names IS Mister Fuzzybottoms Fuzworth of the Kensington party... the 2nd." Lanydx retorted.
" We'll call him Fuzz...Well anyways Fuzz, Welcome to the family! You're our new slave - I mean Assistant!" Zero said.
" Now about payment..." The old man said. Lanydx looked at Zero and sent him a menacing look. Lanydx turned to the old man.
"...SNATCH AND RUN YALL! SNATCH AND RUN!" and the caravaners rode off into the sunset with there newfound slave...we mean assistant.

End of Chapter 2
By Holden Streetly and Dylan( Lanydx )
 

madammina

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Chinese don't do the r/l thing. Only the Japanese.

How did I get tied up?

Anyway... still missing something, but you're writing has gotten alot better.

And, it's the GREMLINS!
 

Lanydx reborn

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My friend helped me alot with this one he basically did alot of the creativity part and then he helped me edit some of it!
 

madammina

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When I write them, I'll send them to you for O.K.'s Then you can do with them what you want.

The computer lab has been very busy this week. I haven't really gotten a chance to use computers until tonight.
 

Zero

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Good Chapter and ask other people to read your Fanfic to so you can get more posts.
 
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