- Joined
- Jun 14, 2004
- Messages
- 3,098
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Any man worth his salt is going to have a sizable trail of regret decorating the road behind him. It's an unavoidable byproduct of personal growth. We make mistakes, we learn from them, and then -- if we're mature about it -- we regret them.
No, I've never raped anybody. I didn't vote for Bush. I never bought an N-Gage. I don't have any criminal record to speak of, and I was never a fan of Yoko Ono. But still, there are a lot of things I regret and that I would do differently if I could. Don't get me wrong. I like myself, and I like where my life is at right now. But if I knew then the things that I know now, my life would look very different than what it does, and the changes would all be overwhelmingly positive. Most of you would agree, hindsight really is 20/20. So tell me:
If you could travel back in time as your current self to any previous point(s) in your life and mentor a younger version of yourself, what would you say? What advice would you give to yourself in the past to improve your life in the present, or to make the experiences that lead you here a little easier?
My list has the potential to be endless (and to take a far more serious/emotional tone than what I'm going to set right now), but off the top of my head, these things come to mind:
To eight year old me: You are going to be on the receiving end of a lot of suicide threats over the next decade or so, and they are always going to be false alarms. Don't allow yourself to be manipulated by that shit. Anybody who is narcissistic enough to think that you're concerned with their blight in the first place is too narcissistic to end their own life.
To twelve year old me: Convince your parents to invest every last cent they own into Apple, Facebook, and Google stock. Also, tell your dad to take out a second mortgage so that he can bet all of it on the Colts in Super Bowl XLI. Either your parents take your advice and we become extremely wealthy, or your parents don't take your advice and they spend the rest of their lives hating themselves and believing that their child is clairvoyant. Win/win.
To fourteen year old me: Try not to be self conscious about your weight while you're in middle school. It’s just a biological thing, okay? Lots of kids are fat. You may be a little bit heavy right now, but you’ll steadily begin to lose that about halfway through your freshman year, and by the time you’re fifteen you’ll be annoyed by how small you are. And all your friends are going to get fat after high school anyway.
To thirteen year old me: No, you are not a communist. It's just a phase. I'm sorry.
To ten year old me: Stop taking Taekwondo lessons immediately. You want something that’s going to be practical in a self defense scenario, and on the proverbial scale of martial arts effectiveness, Taekwondo is just a step above Yoga. Try Judo instead. Or join track and field. Something. Anything.
To sixteen year old me: Take your SATs and start applying for colleges NOW. Do NOT wait until the last minute like I did unless you really enjoy dealing with stress and disappointment.
You don't have to write it out as if you're addressing yourself like I did, btw.
No, I've never raped anybody. I didn't vote for Bush. I never bought an N-Gage. I don't have any criminal record to speak of, and I was never a fan of Yoko Ono. But still, there are a lot of things I regret and that I would do differently if I could. Don't get me wrong. I like myself, and I like where my life is at right now. But if I knew then the things that I know now, my life would look very different than what it does, and the changes would all be overwhelmingly positive. Most of you would agree, hindsight really is 20/20. So tell me:
If you could travel back in time as your current self to any previous point(s) in your life and mentor a younger version of yourself, what would you say? What advice would you give to yourself in the past to improve your life in the present, or to make the experiences that lead you here a little easier?
My list has the potential to be endless (and to take a far more serious/emotional tone than what I'm going to set right now), but off the top of my head, these things come to mind:
To eight year old me: You are going to be on the receiving end of a lot of suicide threats over the next decade or so, and they are always going to be false alarms. Don't allow yourself to be manipulated by that shit. Anybody who is narcissistic enough to think that you're concerned with their blight in the first place is too narcissistic to end their own life.
To twelve year old me: Convince your parents to invest every last cent they own into Apple, Facebook, and Google stock. Also, tell your dad to take out a second mortgage so that he can bet all of it on the Colts in Super Bowl XLI. Either your parents take your advice and we become extremely wealthy, or your parents don't take your advice and they spend the rest of their lives hating themselves and believing that their child is clairvoyant. Win/win.
To fourteen year old me: Try not to be self conscious about your weight while you're in middle school. It’s just a biological thing, okay? Lots of kids are fat. You may be a little bit heavy right now, but you’ll steadily begin to lose that about halfway through your freshman year, and by the time you’re fifteen you’ll be annoyed by how small you are. And all your friends are going to get fat after high school anyway.
To thirteen year old me: No, you are not a communist. It's just a phase. I'm sorry.
To ten year old me: Stop taking Taekwondo lessons immediately. You want something that’s going to be practical in a self defense scenario, and on the proverbial scale of martial arts effectiveness, Taekwondo is just a step above Yoga. Try Judo instead. Or join track and field. Something. Anything.
To sixteen year old me: Take your SATs and start applying for colleges NOW. Do NOT wait until the last minute like I did unless you really enjoy dealing with stress and disappointment.
You don't have to write it out as if you're addressing yourself like I did, btw.