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Is the romantic love real? And if it is, what's so special about it?



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Belluga

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yes relationship is important but if you have both isn't it better hehe ^^
 

NovaDragon

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yes relationship is important but if you have both isn't it better hehe ^^
There are a lot more risks and dangers to romantic relationships than they are to platonic relationships. Why do you think most fathers and brothers don't act the same way towards their daughter's or sister's platonic male friends as they do towards a potential boyfriend? It's because they know there's a much higher chance someone could potentially get hurt in a romantic relationship compared to a platonic relationship.

No matter what, a lot of fathers seem to hate it whenever their daughter has a boyfriend (even if he is a good guy). There are even shirts made for daughters that say "I'M NOT ALLOWED TO EVER DATE" and shirts made for fathers that say "DADS AGAINST DAUGHTERS DATING".

There's also a lot of other shirts and merchandise made for fathers that say stuff like "Rules for dating my daughter: #1. You can't!" or "Before you date my daughter, know this: I'm a dad with a shotgun, a shovel, and a backyard."

Most fathers don't want their daughters to have anything to do with boys outside of being friends. Many fathers won't allow their daughters to date when they are in high school or still living with them.

I have also heard many fathers on the internet say that they hate the idea of their daughter having a boyfriend someday, and are completely against it. So it seems to me that most fathers don't ever want their daughters to date and be in a romantic relationship with a guy.

The same thing can be said about brothers and sisters too. No matter what, a lot of brothers seem to hate it whenever their sister has a boyfriend (even if the guy is a good guy).

And I have also too have heard many brothers on the internet say that they hate the idea of their sister having a boyfriend someday, and are completely against it. And so it seems to me that most brothers (like fathers) don't ever want their sisters to date and be in a romantic relationship with a guy.

So it seems that most fathers don't ever want their daughters to find love and be in a romantic relationship with someone, and it also seems that most brothers don't ever want their sisters to find love and be in a romantic relationship with someone, and so to me, it seems that a lot of fathers and brothers don't ever want their daughters/sisters to have a husband someday.

I don't blame them though for thinking that way since romantic love and romantic relationships can be a bad thing for someone since a broken heart can cause a person a lot of pain, and there's a lot of risks of someone getting emotionally and/or physically hurt in a romantic relationship.

Platonic relationships don't have that many risks or dangers in them, and that's why most fathers and brothers don't make a big deal about their daughters or sisters having platonic male friends, but make a big deal when they have a boyfriend (or potential boyfriend). Most fathers and brothers usually like their daughter's or sister's platonic male friends, while they usually dislike their daughter's or sister's boyfriends (or potential boyfriends). So that's another reason why platonic relationships are better.

So those could also be other reasons why the concept of romantic relationships isn't a good thing because of how protective fathers and brothers tend to be whenever their daughter or sister dates someone since they are afraid that the boyfriend will be a pervert that will make their daughter or sister uncomfortable (also break her heart or abuse her).

Here's a YouTube video about overprotective fathers:
The Overprotective Dad | Dad Talk - YouTube
The dad says at the beginning of the video that it's 100% accurate that dads don't want anyone to date their daughters.


Also, here's an article about overprotective fathers:
 

Belluga

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Wow I really appreciate it, hmm, after thinking about it again, it's true because girls must be taken care of at school age and focus on lessons.
thank you i appreciate it :D
 

NovaDragon

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Wow I really appreciate it, hmm, after thinking about it again, it's true because girls must be taken care of at school age and focus on lessons.
thank you i appreciate it :D
In my opinion, romantic love should not be on the highest pedestal. In my opinion, parents and siblings family love is the strongest. Family knows who you are. Romance is fake for lots of people, put on a false persona and romance on most parts gets ugly real fast. For the reality of romance is no Disney love story.

Parents and siblings family love is one of the strongest types of love there is. If romantic love is actually real, it would be one of the weakest types of love there is.
 

lolapaluuza

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Read this somewhere on reddit. Not everyone needs that kind of love.
It all depends on your language of communication: if gifts / actions are important to you, then this is just romantic love. If it is important for you to feel support in a relationship and the most important thing is harmony and stability, then romance is just a waste of energy and money.
 
D

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I'm starting to think it's not real or special. I mean about more than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other, while most platonic best friends remain friends until death.

So I'm starting to think that having a platonic best friend is a lot better than having a romantic partner or spouse is.
To me it's real but not as special or foolproof as we were raised to believe. Any relationship involves a lot of work and has a lot of risk. That runs the gamut from love, friendship, family etc. So it's a choice you have to make.
 

Sonofjafar

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My love life has primarily followed the pattern of me being either stupid, horny, or both, female schoolmates from high school taking advantage of it, and acting like it’s my fault when we break up
 

Launchpad

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it's a potentially interesting topic but this thread more often feels like a group of incel supervillains meeting around a table discussing what their plan is to destroy the planet because women rejected them
 

Sonofjafar

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it's a potentially interesting topic but this thread more often feels like a group of incel supervillains meeting around a table discussing what their plan is to destroy the planet because women rejected them
There was one time where the break up was my fault and I can perfectly accept that. It’s just that the majority of my love life has been friends with benefits or getting cheated on
 

Raz

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As someone who recently ended a five year relationship, I definitely see the value in romantic love and all that it can bring to someone's life. But you have to be prepared to mourn it when it is over. Right now I'm just focused on doing me because I don't know if I have it in me to put myself on the line like that again. I'm sure with time I will become more open to the possibilities of pursuing romantic love again. But good god are there a lot of frogs out there.
 

Sonofjafar

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As someone who recently ended a five year relationship, I definitely see the value in romantic love and all that it can bring to someone's life. But you have to be prepared to mourn it when it is over. Right now I'm just focused on doing me because I don't know if I have it in me to put myself on the line like that again. I'm sure with time I will become more open to the possibilities of pursuing romantic love again. But good god are there a lot of frogs out there.
Sorry to hear that mate
 
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Seasaltrio

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Also, here are 13 reasons why your best friend is more important than your romantic partner or spouse is:

1. Your best friend has seen you at your worst and they still love you. They have no need to see you looking pretty or together all the time. You could show up in curlers with the biggest pimple ever and they’d still accept you.
2. Your best friend has probably been around longer than your partner. They are reliable, loyal and entrenched in your life.
3. You don’t necessarily have more fun with your best friend but it’s a different kind of fun. It feels more relaxed and honest.
4. You don’t have to impress your best friend. You can be yourself.
5. Your best friend will drop everything and come rescue you and you’d do the same for them.
6. Your best friend will understand you and not judge you. You talk to them and feel totally understood for once in this big, bad world.
7. Your best friend has probably known you when you were a grungy, gross middle schooler or when you puked all over yourself freshman year. They’ve known you through every phase of your life.
8. You’ve always been sure about your best friend, but you sometimes doubt if your partner is really “the one.”
9. You never fight with your best friend the way you fight with your partner.
10. Your best friend is there for you after every break up and through every awful ex. They will put you back together when you’re hurt.
11. You know if things get tough you and your best friend can run off to Mexico and go on the run.
12. There’s nothing sexual going on so you can cuddle up and watch TV together for hours and there’s no pressure to do anything but that.
13. Your best friend has probably done more for you in life, in terms of favors and life experience, than your partner has. You should show them more appreciation.
I mean, all this stuff can be applied to your romantic partner/spouse too. A lot of people have different definitions of what a 'romantic partner' is. Personally, I think it's someone you can stay with for the rest of your life- like a best friend on steroids. It's someone who always is there for you and has your back. Sure, every couple has fights at least every once in a while, but you need to find the right person to start a relationship with, so you can always bounce back.
 

NovaDragon

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I mean, all this stuff can be applied to your romantic partner/spouse too. A lot of people have different definitions of what a 'romantic partner' is. Personally, I think it's someone you can stay with for the rest of your life- like a best friend on steroids. It's someone who always is there for you and has your back. Sure, every couple has fights at least every once in a while, but you need to find the right person to start a relationship with, so you can always bounce back.
There's a lot of dangers and risks to romantic relationships, so they should be avoided. The concept of romance should be removed from this world.

Most parents hate the idea of their daughter dating and getting married someday and want them to be single for their whole life because of how dangerous romantic relationships are, while most of the time, they're ok with their daughter having platonic friends. That's because romantic relationships are far more dangerous than platonic relationships are.

Most parents (both fathers and mothers) who have daughters are hoping their daughter never dates or get married and remain single for their whole life because it's much safer to be single than it is to be in a romantic relationship.
 

Sonofjafar

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There's a lot of dangers and risks to romantic relationships, so they should be avoided. The concept of romance should be removed from this world.

Most parents hate the idea of their daughter dating and getting married someday and want them to be single for their whole life because of how dangerous romantic relationships are, while most of the time, they're ok with their daughter having platonic friends. That's because romantic relationships are far more dangerous than platonic relationships are.

Most parents (both fathers and mothers) who have daughters are hoping their daughter never dates or get married and remain single for their whole life because it's much safer to be single than it is to be in a romantic relationship.
I’m not sure where you’re getting that info but I personally stay single because it makes nights on the town a lot cheaper
 
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