It's quite a common thing to have a crush on your best friend, right?
Yet my situation stretches a bit deeper than just a simple crush which you can ignore, in the fact that I may just be in love with him.
I've known this boy for quite some time now, we met in 2009 when I first went to college to study my A-levels. We became the best of friends due to how insanely alike we were, it was like we knew what one-another was thinking. So we embark on this amazing friendship and then one day I just wake up and think to myself.. hmm, nah it can't be.
So I walk into college see him and my hands go all sweaty and what not and I begin to panic. I knew for a fact I was gay but I didn't know he was so I couldn't even for a second begin to start thinking about him like that. So I just carried on with the friendship as normal, although I would get very mardy when people would refer to us as a bromance.. I couldn't look at him like this and at the same time refer to us as brothers, it was weird. Haha!
So one day we are at a friends birthday party and we are messing about like we always do and then we go to lie down on the hill to look at the stars as we were pretty tired out from all the running around. We had a lot of alcohol in our systems and I remember saying that I was so cold to which he began to hug me, I was shocked but of course I didn't complain.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, we began getting closer and closer until one day we fell out when I left to go to University, it was the saddest thing ever as we were so so close and had even got.. closer in the past few weeks before I left.
So recently in the present day, we have reconnected via facebook and I am going back home next week for Easter break which is three weeks and we are meeting up again.
My big issue is that I still and I think always will have these incredibly strong feelings for him which I know is beyond a crush as to how close we were, but what do I do?
I'm so confused as I really want our best friendship back, but if there is a possibility of more then that would be perfect as I know we would be perfect.
Help!!!?
Yet my situation stretches a bit deeper than just a simple crush which you can ignore, in the fact that I may just be in love with him.
I've known this boy for quite some time now, we met in 2009 when I first went to college to study my A-levels. We became the best of friends due to how insanely alike we were, it was like we knew what one-another was thinking. So we embark on this amazing friendship and then one day I just wake up and think to myself.. hmm, nah it can't be.
So I walk into college see him and my hands go all sweaty and what not and I begin to panic. I knew for a fact I was gay but I didn't know he was so I couldn't even for a second begin to start thinking about him like that. So I just carried on with the friendship as normal, although I would get very mardy when people would refer to us as a bromance.. I couldn't look at him like this and at the same time refer to us as brothers, it was weird. Haha!
So one day we are at a friends birthday party and we are messing about like we always do and then we go to lie down on the hill to look at the stars as we were pretty tired out from all the running around. We had a lot of alcohol in our systems and I remember saying that I was so cold to which he began to hug me, I was shocked but of course I didn't complain.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, we began getting closer and closer until one day we fell out when I left to go to University, it was the saddest thing ever as we were so so close and had even got.. closer in the past few weeks before I left.
So recently in the present day, we have reconnected via facebook and I am going back home next week for Easter break which is three weeks and we are meeting up again.
My big issue is that I still and I think always will have these incredibly strong feelings for him which I know is beyond a crush as to how close we were, but what do I do?
I'm so confused as I really want our best friendship back, but if there is a possibility of more then that would be perfect as I know we would be perfect.
Help!!!?
