and I happen to be in love with my best friend but I sincerely wish I wasn't because he's like a brother to me and I told him because I'm pretty courage like that and felt he deserved to know and now we barely talk but it's mainly me keeping my distance because I feel he's only trying to be nice to me and I can understand the awkward letdown you might feel when you realise the bro that had your back was really just staring at your arse. But it's not like that. I just feel it'd sound like bullshit if I tried to put it any other way. He was the only one I could vent to, share my real problems with, and vice versa. But this time he was the problem, and I had nobody else to tell but him. He might have shared it with my other good mate (I don't blame him), who coincidentally hates homosexuals. Really, a lot of my friends do, and when they find out that'll probably be it for me. I personally don't like it myself, I've tried dating girls, hoping I'd eventually find the one I'd fall in love with, but nothing. I don't want to make gay friends because I've never liked a single gay person I've ever met. I cringe at the notion of "gay pride". I feel like I've been denied something so critical to my life.
inb4 "cool story bro" and "well they're not your real friends if they won't like who you are hurr" I know them, they've been there for me, for things admittedly less "worse" than this. They might accept it, but it won't be the same afterward. Obviously. But I'm just saying I wish things didn't have to change, I wish I at least had control of this one thing.
plus it's also going to suck because "faggot" was one of my favourite pay-outs and you know what fuck it I'm still going to use it.
inb4 "cool story bro" and "well they're not your real friends if they won't like who you are hurr" I know them, they've been there for me, for things admittedly less "worse" than this. They might accept it, but it won't be the same afterward. Obviously. But I'm just saying I wish things didn't have to change, I wish I at least had control of this one thing.
fuck you.oh well dats the beauty of lifee it doesnt go da way we plan hohoho
plus it's also going to suck because "faggot" was one of my favourite pay-outs and you know what fuck it I'm still going to use it.