Help/Support ► STALKERR

[Chakolat Strawberry]

So there's this girl in my school with barley any friends. One day, she just comes to our lunch table and decides to sit there. Now there's always one of my friends who can't sit there at our lunch table anymore. Field trips, going to classes, everywhere she pretty much stalks us. Worst of all, she stalks me the most. When there's noone else, she follows me around, pretty much copies everything I do and always gets the exact same things I get for lunch. This has been going on for about a year or two now. No matter what I do, she always comes back to stalk me and my friends, me mostly. I'm tired of this going on, does anyone know what I should do?

 

[Lolita]

Tell her nicely to stop bothering you.
If not, bitch at her. :'D
/lmfaonothat'shorribleadvice

I say tell the principal or your parents so she could get some help? No friends leads to loneliness, and loneliness leads to depression, and depression can likely lead to suicidal thoughts. :/

 

[Lancelot]

I'm tempted to say "turn around and give her a what for" but that might not necessarily work.

I'm intrigued to know if she follows you home too o.o then you could probably apply for a restraining order

 

[Chakolat Strawberry]

Tell her nicely to stop bothering you.
If not, bitch at her. :'D
/lmfaonothat'shorribleadvice

I say tell the principal or your parents so she could get some help? No friends leads to loneliness, and loneliness leads to depression, and depression can likely lead to suicidal thoughts. :/

She goes to the guidance couselour some Wednesdays for help. Though that looks like it isn't helping.

I'm tempted to say "turn around and give her a what for" but that might not necessarily work.

I'm intrigued to know if she follows you home too o.o then you could probably apply for a restraining order

No thank god.

 

[Lolita]

She should attend more and get some help before she starts getting suicidal thoughts. ouo
Lmfao, imagine her following you home.
I like to watch you sleep. It's fascinating.

 

[Aucune Raison]

Two years? What do you know about her?

 

[Lancelot]

xD That's something Mikami would probably look like...

But in all seriousness, it really sounds like you need to tae it up with either the councellor themself, or some form of staff =/

 

[Ordeith]

A "stalker" of sorts, hm? I've dealt with similar issues as well, and if I were in your situation, I wouldn't fret very much.
Most folks who act as such are merely incredibly lonely souls who attach themselves to individuals who seem the most friendly, or the individuals who they admire the most for whatever reason it may be, most often popularity. These folks literally have nothing to their pitiful lives; no friends, no happiness, and mostly because of physical differences coupled with extraordinary shyness. They're most likely doomed to a life of uncomfortable solitude unless somebody intervenes and provides a shoulder to lean upon. If I were you, I would explain your situation and feelings to this girl as sensitively as possible, utilizing the word "I" as opposed to "you" as often as possible. I'm not suggesting that you devote every second of your life to this person afterwards, but you should make it known that you'll be there for them if they're ever in need of somebody to speak with.

This poor girl is probably downright miserable; show her a bit of sympathy every now and then to ensure that she doesn't end up a complete failure later down the road.

 

[Eva]

Have you tried maybe talking to her? Then maybe you'll find out what/why she's following you around.

 

[Some Dude1]

A "stalker" of sorts, hm? I've dealt with similar issues as well, and if I were in your situation, I wouldn't fret very much.
Most folks who act as such are merely incredibly lonely souls who attach themselves to individuals who seem the most friendly, or the individuals who they admire the most for whatever reason it may be, most often popularity. These folks literally have nothing to their pitiful lives; no friends, no happiness, and mostly because of physical differences coupled with extraordinary shyness. They're most likely doomed to a life of uncomfortable solitude unless somebody intervenes and provides a shoulder to lean upon. If I were you, I would explain your situation and feelings to this girl as sensitively as possible, utilizing the word "I" as opposed to "you" as often as possible. I'm not suggesting that you devote every second of your life to this person afterwards, but you should make it known that you'll be there for them if they're ever in need of somebody to speak with.

This poor girl is probably downright miserable; show her a bit of sympathy every now and then to ensure that she doesn't end up a complete failure later down the road.

wow... now thats really really good advice... rep

 

[The Lionheart]

This poor girl is probably downright miserable; show her a bit of sympathy every now and then to ensure that she doesn't end up a complete failure later down the road.

 

[Shade737]

Are you sure she is a actual "stalker" or just a lonely person who wants more friends?

 

[Deleted member 36435]

Let me see if I can get this scenario right.

1. Lonely girl follows around people she wants to be friends with (we'll call them girls.)
2. Girls ignore person, instead of talking to her and seeing what she wants or trying to work something out.
3. One of the girls comes to internet to ask for help.

Solution is pretty obvious.

 

[Danica Syer]

So there's this girl in my school with barley any friends. One day, she just comes to our lunch table and decides to sit there. Now there's always one of my friends who can't sit there at our lunch table anymore. Field trips, going to classes, everywhere she pretty much stalks us. Worst of all, she stalks me the most. When there's noone else, she follows me around, pretty much copies everything I do and always gets the exact same things I get for lunch. This has been going on for about a year or two now. No matter what I do, she always comes back to stalk me and my friends, me mostly. I'm tired of this going on, does anyone know what I should do?

This girl must be lonely. Why would she have stalk you? To make new friends, I shall think. Otherwise, have you tried befriending her? If not, she sounds desperate. Also have you tried talking to your parents or any grown-ups you feel confident talking to about it? If you don't want to do anything like hurt her feelings, have you tried to tell her gently that it creeps you out or anything. Or how about "Can you please leave me alone?" or something between the lines of that. I don't know what to say other then maybe if she does literally stalk you, try to find a way to tell her to "stop." Otherwise, I'm not sure at the moment. Good luck!

 

[Papou]

There's not really anything you can do to get rid of her quickly by the time it's been going on for that long. If somebody forces their way into your social circle, you have to politely make it clear that they aren't welcome there. It sounds a bit mean that way, but with some people you end up stuck with them forever if you don't. Most people pick up on not being invited into conversations and activities and notice how relationships are between people in a group are different from their own with those people.

If not being invited to be included in things isn't enough to give her the hint, you might have to resort to being kind of a bitch and throw in some eye rolls and whatnot. Subtle, snide things that will make the person think after a while, "You know, I've never had a particularly good relationship with any of these people, maybe I should find some other friends". Then again, I haven't dealt with this kind of stuff since sixth or seventh grade, so maybe that suggestion isn't so appropriate... some people will take a hint quickly, some take a while to get it but eventually do, and some just don't get it at all and need to be told outright that they need to back off.

It can be tough to deal with and it depends on the person. I had a stalkerish friend when I was in junior high and I eventually had to tell her that her obsessiveness wasn't okay. And then there are people who you don't particularly like and find kind of annoying and dorkish that you just let be because they're not much of a bother.

 

[_EX]

I say try to get to know her and befriend her. I dont see why it shouldnt work if shes chosen you to be with. It means its you that has to put the effort in to like her though.

 

[Orion]

Tell her to piss off, or at least cut the crap and outright be honest instead of taking up space and not being wanted.

 

[Chakolat Strawberry]

Tell her to piss off, or at least cut the crap and outright be honest instead of taking up space and not being wanted.

lol.


She's not the person I want to be friends with though. She's a big slut and makes up a ton of lies of attention. I know she does that for friends/attention but she lies so much. (Yesterday on AIM she said her leg was broken yet the next day at school she was fine. o_o

I was actually nice to her before; on this trip in 7th grade in Virgina, I hung out with her because noone else wanted to(my friends told me to stay away but I was like "She's not that bad, what are you guys talking about?")

I just don't want her following me, that's all. I have been a little cruel lately, I admit that, but I just want her to leave. This fall, it's our first year of high school, so she'll probably make new friends there, and mabye we can actually be friends. If she quits the lying of course.

 

[_EX]

lol.


She's not the person I want to be friends with though. She's a big slut and makes up a ton of lies of attention. I know she does that for friends/attention but she lies so much. (Yesterday on AIM she said her leg was broken yet the next day at school she was fine. o_o

I was actually nice to her before; on this trip in 7th grade in Virgina, I hung out with her because noone else wanted to(my friends told me to stay away but I was like "She's not that bad, what are you guys talking about?")

I just don't want her following me, that's all. I have been a little cruel lately, I admit that, but I just want her to leave. This fall, it's our first year of high school, so she'll probably make new friends there, and mabye we can actually be friends. If she quits the lying of course.

Pffft how can sluts be without friends? That makes no sense. Unless shes a horse.

 

[Chakolat Strawberry]

Pffft how can sluts be without friends? That makes no sense. Unless shes a horse.

I never got that either. She's like a lot of girls in my school, yet on friends. She's a mysterious one.