Help/Support ► This couldn't get anymore f'd up...

[Bukkake Sensei]

haha ok

there's nothing more supportive than instilling doubt in people about the ones they love, for sure. pardon me!

honestly after 3 years and all the work financially and logistically that's been put into it, it is so hard for me to believe she'd just be messing with him.

As usual, the point goes straight over your head. Let me spell it out for you. Even if this girl didn't have a horrible reputation, even if we knew for a fact that she wasn't manipulating him, even if they are in love and this guy isn't just following his dick and his imagination halfway across the country, even if those were all non-issues, HE'S STILL TALKING ABOUT MOVING IN WITH A GIRL THAT HE'S NEVER EVEN MET FACE TO FACE. Being in love with somebody and being able to remain sane while sharing a living space with them are two entirely different things, and they often don't rhyme well with one another. I could sit here all day listing off people that I absolutely cherish, and whom I would also never want to live with for any reason whatsoever. You know how I can make that judgment? Because I've actually met them.

Never mind all of the ambiguity surrounding this girl's trustworthiness. It's just a shitty fcuking idea, and it would still be a shitty fcuking idea if she were Mother Teresa.

 

[_EX]

Sam, I've known her for 3 years.. I know she can change and is trying. I wouldnt expect a friend of 3 years to screw me over and me end up with indentity theft... It's still a risk non-the-less. And I do feel I love her. We've tried seeing other people, but we just end back up at square one. when i'm with someone else she's all I can think about. This will obviously be the biggest decision I've made, and it's a back and forth battle between my heart and my brain. Giving her this info I risk everything.. but I love her.. see how I'm f*cked here?

Even if she screwed you over, you wouldnt be in a horrible situation. You could try going back home, or staying there and getting a job for a while and just wait out the 6 months until you get taken away.

To me, the rewards seem greater than the risks.
She would have to be a pretty patient con-woman to wait 3 years to get anything.

Go for it. I would be sad if you didnt.

 

[Counter Shock]

well... lol a few years ago I was playin this online game at like, 4 am one morning, couldnt sleep, and that's where we met. we'd text, call, web cam after that over the years as friends but it started to grow into something more..

I realize how insanely lame that sounds, but that's how we met.

 

[scubasteve]

if she takes your info you can always report it i mean it won't exactly be a mystery what happened bustAH

 

[Reflection]

ignoring the above paragraph of hostility THAT IS SUPER CUTE :3 not lame!

i hope you do go through with it <3

 

[Decrith]

Ok, I'm going with Sam on this one, I didn't realize that you guys only met online. ~_~

Although its still your decision.

 

[Counter Shock]

if she takes your info you can always report it i mean it won't exactly be a mystery what happened bustAH

True, recovering from identity theft can be a bitch, but it's do-able :/

ignoring the above paragraph of hostility THAT IS SUPER CUTE :3 not lame!

i hope you do go through with it <3

lol, thank you

As usual, the point goes straight over your head. Let me spell it out for you. Even if this girl didn't have a horrible reputation, even if we knew for a fact that she wasn't manipulating him, even if they are in love and this guy isn't just following his dick and his imagination halfway across the country, even if those were all non-issues, HE'S STILL TALKING ABOUT MOVING IN WITH A GIRL THAT HE'S NEVER EVEN MET FACE TO FACE. Being in love with somebody and being able to remain sane while sharing a living space with them are two entirely different things, and they often don't rhyme well with one another. I could sit here all day listing off people that I absolutely cherish, and whom I would also never want to live with for any reason whatsoever. You know how I can make that judgment? Because I've actually met them.

Never mind all of the ambiguity surrounding this girl's trustworthiness. It's just a shitty fcuking idea, and it would still be a shitty fcuking idea if she were Mother Teresa.

you have a point here, but it's only for 6 months tops.. to find all of this stuff out before I leave.. we're not freakin getting married ffs.

 

[Bukkake Sensei]

True, recovering from identity theft can be a bitch, but it's do-able :/

The fact that you're even considering this as a potential risk says it all, doesn't it?

you have a point here, but it's only for 6 months tops.. to find all of this stuff out before I leave.. we're not freakin getting married ffs.

Then don't act as if you are. You wouldn't be moving in with her out of necessity, you'd be uprooting your life and moving 1500 miles away to live with her because you have a crush. Put it into perspective for a second.

 

[Decrith]

Honestly, over 80% of relationships that started online fails. I had one, and it failed miserably.

 

[Taylor]

You're more or less fighting Sam on most points he makes, so it kind of sounds like your mind is already made up. :v

 

[Counter Shock]

Then don't act as if you are. You wouldn't be moving in with her out of necessity, you'd be uprooting your life and moving 1500 miles away to live with her because you have a crush. Put it into perspective for a second.

I wouldn't exactly call it a crush. I've had crushes before. I've had flings, one night stands, all that shit. this feels like something more. I cant say I've been "in love" before, but this is the closest I've gotten and it scares the hell out of me. for all these reasons I've mentioned. I'm not going to lie you make a damn good point and I've got alot off thinking to do. but it's going to come down to do I really want to wonder what if the rest of my life?

 

[Nyangoro]

I have to agree with Sam. I mean, you may not think it, but what you're deciding is pretty big. First, you are deciding to leave your family/friends. True, your going to the marines in six months; but that doesn't change the ramifications of your decision (example, your family/friends could feel that you don't want anything to do with them if you are willing to up and leave for a girl that you've never actually seen).

Second, though she may be a friend, her character is still in question. Even if her character wasn't in question, handing that kind of information over the phone to someone you've never met in person just sounds entirely too risky for my taste.

Third, as Sam said, you've never met this person face-to-face, and therefore have no idea what to expect when it comes to living together. Granted, you need to try in order to know if it will work out, but at the same time you need to be aware of the fact that, in order to test the waters, you must leave behind what you know and go to a place that you've (likely) never been to before.

 

[Decrith]

You're more or less fighting Sam on most points he makes, so it kind of sounds like your mind is already made up. :v

This. Its obvious that your mind is made up ( you might not admit it now, but it shows). Anyway, remember that whatever choice you make, you have to prepare for the worst.

 

[Bukkake Sensei]

This. Its obvious that your mind is made up ( you might not admit it now, but it shows). Anyway, remember that whatever choice you make, you have to prepare for the worst.

What's especially obvious is that he's having tremendous doubts about this entire situation, and he came here looking for us to validate what he already knows is a bad decision but feels compelled to go through with.

 

[Vayne Mechanics]

oh shit this is half way across the country? shit then man idk. thought it was across the state when i read it oops *tired*

 

[Ophan]

ignoring the above paragraph of hostility THAT IS SUPER CUTE :3 not lame!

i hope you do go through with it <3

wow...spoken like someone with very little experience in life, lol

first off you're giving someone your social security across the otherside of the country. Sorry to say, but 3 years or not that's pretty freaking stupid

and if you do get you're identity stolen, know that social security is a large area of danger. Never let someone sign you on a lease without presence. Any landlord will say that. If someone goes through with it without considering getting in contact with you, chances are she really is playing you for a fool. If your identity does get stolen via your social security, she can run that number through to your life leading to a long financial crisis...bad credit etc.

you're 20, still young...you need to know these things because ppl have met these problems before, and it doesn't matter how long you know a person. Life is a gamble in of itself. You freak it up this big right now...you're screwed, and you'll be saying goodbye to whatever chance you have with the Marines as well.

True, recovering from identity theft can be a bitch, but it's do-able :/

keep tellin yourself that dude. There are a lot of horror stories on identity theft

 

[Dogenzaka]

Normally I would say 100% no but you're going into the marines in 6 months....

Still, though, I don't think it's a wise decision to completely isolate yourself from everything you know to be with a stranger...can't you just visit before you commit or something? Don't put all your eggs in the basket for 6 months o_o

 

[Counter Shock]

Long time no see dogen, lol. To be honest, takin a trip out there to visit first and handle the appartment app in person sounds like a good idea right now.

 

[Ophan]

Long time no see dogen, lol. To be honest, takin a trip out there to visit first and handle the appartment app in person sounds like a good idea right now.

phew, okay. Now that's using you're noggin. Make it a confrontation with the apartment app first before giving info in someone else's hand

 

[Counter Shock]

I figure this might be the route I'll have to take anyway. while I'm there I can handle apps for jobs in person, rather then messing with them online. Which should make that easier.