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Fanfiction ► The Dilemma (FF XIII and FF XIII-2)

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New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you
Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy or any of their characters
Rated: T
Description: The trailer for Final Fantasy XIII-2 has serviced on the internet. Unfortunately for Snow, Fang, Sazh, Hope and Vanille, they aren't shown anywhere. How will they react?

Alas the tales of Final Fantasy XIII were not yet over; at least not for Lightning. For Square Enix had announced at Square Enix 1st Production Department Premier event on January 18th 2011 that there would be a sequel to the ever so anticipated game. The trailer of Final Fantasy XIII-2 was shown on Youtube (illegally) a couple of days after the announcement leaving many fans excited...but also leaving a lot of flamers complaining and some completely raping the English language at the same time.

As for Lightning she was quite proud of being in a new game that she wouldn't stop boasting about it to the rest of the gang. Everyone else got curious as to why Lightning was boasting about a new game. The L'cie gang were hanging out at the Esthiem's residence complaining about Lightning being a show off.

"Lightning's doing it again" Vanille complained. "She did the same thing when she appeared in that new Dissidia game"

Sazh nodded in agreement. "Mm hmm. And now there's some new game that we don't even know about"

Hope got an idea. "Hey maybe we should look it up on the Internet. There must be some leaked trailers or some information on it already"

So everyone followed Hope towards the study and crowded around him. "Hmm let's see" Hope typed into 'new Final Fantasy XIII game' and many things popped up. He clicked onto one of the many fans sites and skimmed through the news panel.

"Hey looks like Agito XIII changed it's name" Sazh laughed. "Type-O…what kind of name is that?"

"I think it's Type-zero not Type-O" Fang explained.

Hope looked at the screen and found a new title in the Fabula Nova Crystallis series. "Hey this must've been what Lightning was talking about" Everyone leaned towards the screen and watched the short trailer. At the end the other characters who were in the first game but were not shown anywhere in the trailer looked annoyed.

"Hey how come we aren't shown on this trailer?" Snow complained. "I only saw myself for a few seconds and that was a repeated scene from the last game"

"Hey at least you got a few seconds" Fang rolled her eyes. "I wasn't even in there"

"Well it was only the first trailer" Vanille explained. "Remember when the first trailer came out for Final Fantasy XIII. Lightning was the only character in there as well but then we started to appear in the other trailers"

The others nodded in agreement. "That's true"

"Y'know, Square Enix never tells us the names of these characters when they introduce them into trailer. I wish they did 'cause I want to know who that guy in that trailer was. Damn he was hot!" Fang said.

Everyone gave Fang a strange look. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah I mean he was tall, dark and handsome"

"Umm Fang…He kind of looks like a male version of you" Hope said.

Fang shuddered. "Damn it short stuff! You just ruined my image of him"

Just as the gang was searching up the new game on the Internet, Lightning walked into the study in a new costume and a smirk on her face. "So liking the looks of my new game"

"OUR new game you mean" Sazh sneered. "Why yes we are, once we're shown in the trailers it's gonna look good"

Fang was holding in her laughter. "Lightning! What's with the costume? You look like a dork!"

Lightning's smirk faded as she shot a glare at Fang. Lightning was in her new outfit, which were an armored chest plate, armored gloves, armored boots, a loincloth and a random wing on the side. "Hey it's not my idea. Those bloody designers put me in this!"

"Not so smug now are you" Fang giggled. "…Wait if Lightning looks this dorky now…what about the rest of us"

Everyone looked at their clothes and gasped. "No! I've already got a retarded furry thing on my skirt!" Vanille complained. "What worse could they do?"

"Well you guys can't be in the game" Snow said. "You turned into crystal remember?"

Vanille thought about it for a moment. "Oh yeah…they can't put me in any retarded outfits since I'm a crystal now!"

"Same here. Looks like the designers can't touch us for the new game. Good luck with your new dorky outfits. Vanille and I are out of here. Later!" Fang cackled before leaving the Estheim Residency with Vanille.

Everyone else screamed in horror, with the exception of Lightning. "NOOO!"

Lightning looked down on her new outfit. "It doesn't look that bad does it?"

Hope on the other hand was searching the web until something popped up. "Uh oh" Hope muttered.

"What is it?" Snow asked.

"Looks like our new game isn't getting good feedback from the fans" Everyone crowded around Hope again as they saw the comments below the new trailer.

They consisted of many flames by fan boys saying stuff like "oh great another X-2", "This game is gonna suck big time", "Hawt damn who is that smexy guy at the end of the trailer?" "It can't be that bad" and "WtF !$ dIs $H!+? fINaL F@n+a$y !$ Da $h!+Es+ gAM ev. !+ $ux! $qaURe EnIX cn g0 $u( BL@l$!". The gang could not understand that last comment, as they couldn't read it properly.

"What the f*** is wrong with kids these days?" Snow said. "They haven't even played the game and they're already attacking it"

"They're Final Fantasy fans" Hope explained. "They're never satisfied"

The gang nodded in agreement. "That's true. They never are"

Suddenly they heard footsteps. "What was that" Lightning said as she got out her gun-blade. The others got into their fighting positions except for Hope who sat on the computer chair not bothering to get out his boomerang.

"Uh guys…that could be my dad" he mumbled.

"I'm nobody's dad," the mysterious voice said. Outside the study was a tall, dark man with long dark hair, a headband around his head and was wearing a black outfit.

"You!" Lightning growled and went into fighting stance. It was the mysterious un-named antagonist from the trailer.

To be continued


New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you
Chapter 2: Weapon masters and unnamed villians

Everyone stared at the unnamed antagonist with confusion. Lightning on the other hand was getting ready to make a move. The antagonist himself was standing there smirking at the L'cie gang.

"How the hell did you get into my house?" Hope asked, completely ruining the mood of the scene.

"Who knows how I got in?" The unnamed antagonist grinned. "I have my ways. I'm a pretty mysterious person like that"

"Hey Hope, You really need to learn how to close a door" Fang said entering the study with popcorn, candy and a tall soda with Vanille following her carrying a bag of chips and another tall drink. "Anyone could get in"

The unnamed antagonist felt a vain pop. "Thanks a lot! Now they know how I got in!" He yelled.

"Oops sorry about that you hot sexy piece of ass" Fang muttered and took a slurp out of her tall drink.

"Excuse me?" The unnamed antagonist raised a brow.

"Hey what's with all the snacks?" Sazh asked the two girls from the land down under. And by 'Land down under' I mean Pulse because it's the land under Cocoon. It's not Australia I'm talking about. Though Fang and Vanille do seem to have Australian accents and Pulse does kind of looks like the Australian outba-

"GET ON WITH IT!" Snow screamed.

Vanille took a big slurp of her drink. "Oh yeah we thought there'd be a show down here so we brought snacks"

"Well looks like there is" Fang said. "Lightning Vs. Hot Stuff"

The antagonist's eyes sparkled. "Aw shucks, you think I'm hot"

Lightning's eyebrows furrowed. "Fang, you're appealing to his ego. And his ego will boost up his power" Lightning explained.

"Fine" Fang groaned.

Lightning rushed to attack the unnamed antagonist with her gun blade. The antagonist got out his sword and defended himself from Lightning's attack. Fang and Vanille shared their snacks with the others as they watched the battle. Hope was uninterested in the battle and went back to his social networking and looking up videos on youtube…like most teenagers do.

"Why are they fighting again?" Sazh asked.

"I don't know" Snow answered. "It's not like Square's released the game yet"

"We're fighting because…"The unnamed antagonist lowered his sword for a moment. "Wait... why are we fighting?"

Lightning also lowered her weapon. "I have no idea"

The unnamed antagonist threw away his weapon. "Well ain't that great, Square creates me to be Lightning's enemy and I don't even have a reason for being evil"

As Hope was searching for videos to watch on youtube he spotted something. "Guys! The new trailer came out!"

Everyone forgot about the fight and crowded around the computer screen. It was the Trailer shown at E3 2011.

"Well it's about time," The unnamed antagonist said. "Maybe they might announce why I'm Evil…and they may give me a name too"

Snow raised a brow. "You don't have a name? Even Square gave me a temporary name when I was shown to the public"

"Really? What was that?" Fang asked.

Snow took a deep sigh, "Mr. 33cm"

The gang giggled at the name. "Damn Serah's one lucky girl" Fang laughed.

"It's because of the size of my foot not for the size of my unmentionables you sickos!" Snow yelled.

The trailer had fully loaded and the gang watched the trailer with disgust. Lightning because she barely appeared in it and Lebreau said she was dead in the trailer. Hope, Vanille, Sazh and Fang because they weren't in it at all, the unnamed antagonist because he is still unnamed and Snow because Serah was with a guy who looked like a happy version of Squall Leonhart.


Fang glared at the computer screen "so Lightning's sister gets a role but we're still not shown in this trailer? She's more important in this game than we are?"

"How come Team NORA is shown on this trailer and we aren't?" Hope whined. "They're only supporting characters"

"Geez Snow, they haven't changed their clothes in a few years" Vanille said.

"Either they couldn't afford new clothes or square couldn't be bothered designing them in new clothes" Fang explained. "Besides they're only minor characters…I don't think Nomura would put them into new outfits"

"Well Lightning wasn't shown as much in the trailer" Sazh said feeling slightly relieved in a way "Do you think this game's about Serah and that Noel guy"

"And I still haven't been named" The poor unnamed Antagonist whined "I wasn't even shown in this trailer"

Vanille came up to him with her hands behind her back and smiling like an innocent little girl "Can we call you Dumbledore for now"

The unnamed antagonist raised a brow "what?"

"No way Vanille" Sazh said. "He looks more like a Barney Stinson"

"How about The Doctor!" Hope suggested.

The unnamed antagonist was confused "Why are you guys trying to give me a name?"

"'Cause it's annoying referring to you as "that guy" "Unnamed antagonist" "mysterious guy from the trailer" in Fang's case "Hot stuff" Sazh explained "Let's call him Barney Stinson because it sounds like a Legen- wait for it…dary name!"

The unnamed antagonist let out a deep sigh "Square better announce my name soon"

Snow on the other hand looked like he was about to explode in fury. His fists were clenched together and his usual goofy face was replaced with a murderous one. "Who the hell is this Noel Kreiss?" Snow snarled "AND WHAT THE F*** IS HE DOING WITH MY GIRL? I'M GONNA KILL THAT B******"

Suddenly they heard footsteps. The gang turned towards the door and saw two familiar faces walk through. One of them was Serah in a new outfit and the young man who was with her was Noel Kreiss.

"Wow I've never seen houses like this before" Noel said looking amazed at the Estheim residence.

Serah grinned. "Most houses in Cocoon are like this"

"Really? Wow!" Noel looked over at the people around Hope's computer. Most of them were looking confused, Hope was looking shocked and Snow looked like he was about to murder someone. "Hey look! People! HI!" Noel waved. Everyone simply stared and blinked, but mostly stared. He felt a bit uncomfortable with everyone's stares. "We come in peace" Noel said slowly as if he met an undiscovered Alien species.

"YOU!" Snow growled.

"Uh me?" Noel asked pointing to himself innocently.

"YES YOU!" Snow growled. He stormed up to Noel and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HANGING AROUND MY GIRL?"

"Snow?" Serah yelled in surprise

Snow simply dropped Noel to the ground. "Owww my bum!" Noel whined.

"SERAH! What the hell Serah? Why are you hanging out with this jerk?"

"We're looking for Lightning together" Serah explained.

Lightning rolled her eyes "I'm right here" She said with no joy in her voice what so ever.

"Oh hi Lightning!" Serah waved and came over to hug her sister "What's with the outfit?"

"IT'S NOT THAT BAD!" Lightning screamed "And how come this guy's looking for me too?" Lightning pointed at Noel who was rubbing his backside in pain. "I don't even know you"

Noel simply shrugged "I don't know…square hasn't given me a reason yet."

"And seriously? Noel? What kind of name is that?"

"Well it's more creative than 'Lightning" Noel grinned.

The unnamed antagonist snarled "at least you've got a name"

Noel cocked his head to the side "Isn't your name Barney?"

"IT'S NOT F***ING BARNEY!" the antagonist screamed.

Snow ignored Lightning, Noel and 'Barney''s conversation "but Serah? Why did you leave me for him?"

Serah raised a brow "I didn't leave you, I'm still wearing the necklace aren't I?"

Snow cocked his head to the side "then why did you go off with him?" he asked.

Serah shrugged "Well I'm supposed to be looking for Lightning with him and also…LOOK HOW ADORABLE HE IS!" She squealed and pointed at Noel.

"Aww he IS adorable" Vanille also cooed as if Noel was a little puppy.

"Hey ladies I'm not that cute" Noel said as his cheeks went pink with embarrassment.

"Oh puh-lease." Snow muttered under his breath and rolled his eyes "He's not even as tall and as built as I am. Did he ever have a name like 'Mr. 33 cm'?"

"Wait how did YOU guys get in the house?" Hope asked.

Noel scratched the back of his head "the front door was open so we walked in"

Hope's palm met his forehead "I keep forgetting to close that door anyone can walk in"

"You mean people like us?" a mysterious voice said. The gang turned around and saw two young men. One was in a Red school uniform, had platinum blonde hair and his weapon was a deck of cards. The other was a dark man with black hair wearing a dark outfit. It was Ace from Final Fantasy Type-0 and Noctis from Final Fantasy Versus XIII.


Oct 9, 2009
lmao XD i just lol'd at most of that it was great.

And his ego will boost up his power"
lol its Aizen his troll powers have finally gotten him into the FF universe!


Aug 2, 2008
At my house with Riku, Saix, and Zexion, rocking t
Oh man, that was funny. Hope really does need to shut his front door, seeing as anyone and everyone can and has just walked in; part of me was waiting for the Kingdom Hearts gang to just walk in and confuse everyone. Also, I liked all the jokes about the game, especially Snow's temporary name from the first game; Fang has a dirty mind. Anyway, great job, and I look forward to more.


New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you
Chapter 3: Alan! No wait that's Steve

Hope stared at the two young men who came from two different game universes. "It's Noctis from Versus XIII and Ace from Type O!!" He screamed.

Ace lost his cool fighting stance and glared at the gang "IT'S TYPE-0!!!" He screamed "ZERO!!"

Lightning raised a brow "Why are you here?"

Noctis let out a deep sigh "We have a problem". Truthfully Noctis just wanted to be back in his own game's universe but Ace dragged him over to Cocoon.

"How come you guys are getting a sequel when our game isn't even released yet?!!!" Ace complained.

Noctis sighed "Actually I'm not as bothered with this as Ace is. I was just in my game's universe minding my own business but then when you're new game got announced he came over, complained about you guys and dragged me over here." Noctis complained. "But he gave me his Yu-Gi-Oh Cards so I'm cool with that"

"Well it matters to me!!" Ace complained "They're game already got released and now there's going to be a sequel"

Lightning rolled her eyes "why do you care? Your game wasn't even important to begin with". Everyone gasped and Ace looked like he would explode in fury.

"Oh no she didn't" Noel said.

"Shut up Noel!" Snow yelled.

Ace got his composure back together. He took a deep breath to calm himself down "What did you say?" He said, trying to sound as cool as he could but couldn't stop twitching at her response.

"First of all your game was originally going to be on mobile phones, meaning it was a useless game to begin with and secondly your game doesn't even have XIII in the end meaning your game has absolutely nothing to do with us" Lightning explained with an 'as-a-matter-of-fact' tone of voice.

Ace restrained himself from attacking the heroine. "Well my game used to be called Agito XIII" He said, also using an 'as-a-matter-of-fact' tone of voice.

Lightning smirked "but now it's Type-O"

Ace completely lost his cool at this moment. "IT'S TYPE FREAKING ZERO!!!" He screamed as he got out his cards.

Noctis rolled his eyes. "Here we go" He said and also got out his weapon.

"Prepare to die!!" Ace cackled.

Sazh started to panic. These guys meant business. "W-why are you g-g-going to k-k-kill us?" He stuttered "Can't you go to your own universe and wait for your own game to come out?"

"I only just got announced to the public!" Noel panicked "You can't kill me!!"

"I finally get to be an important character instead of being shown in flashbacks and being crystallized" Serah complained.

"I still haven't got a name" The unnamed antagonist complained "besides Barney and that's not going to BE my name"

"We're tired of waiting for our games to come out and for characters to be unnamed." Ace explained "If we kill you all then Square will finish our games because they don't have to worry about this one. Then we will be complete" He gave them an evil smile

"Before Versus XIII gets a lame name like Type-O" Noctis said.

"TYPE 0!!" Ace yelled. He summoned his flame card and set fire to the study. Everyone was panicking, especially Hope since this was HIS house they were trashing.

"STOP TRASHING MY HOUSE!!!" Hope yelled.

"Hope" Fang explained "it got trashed in the first game and Cocoon's ruined in the second game so you have nothing to worry about."

"Uh guys" Noel said nervously "card captor Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke are going to kill us!!"

Lightning got out her gun blade "hmph looks like we're going to have to fight" Everyone else followed Lightning and got out their weapons. Even Serah got out her new bow.

"Since when did you fight?!" Fang asked as she was looking at Serah's new bow.

Serah smiled. "Noel gave it to me!" She explained.

"Noel!!" Snow growled with jealousy. Then he remembered something "wait I just realised…we aren't L'cie anymore"

Sazh raised a brow "Isn't that a good thing?"

"Um…it means we have no magical powers or eidolons" Snow explained.

Sazh's eyes widened "crap, your right!!!"

Just like in Final Fantasy Versus XIII's first trailer, Noctis summoned all his weapons. Some of which destroyed everything in the room, including the computer


Sazh raised a brow "you tweet?" he asked "Seriously?"

Hope rolled his eyes "Well…yeah I'm a teenager, I'm into social networks" He explained. "Oh speaking of which" Hope got out his phone and logged onto Facebook.

'OMFG Ace from Type-O and Noctis from Vs 13 trashed my house' He typed as his Facebook status. Seconds later he got 2 notifications. The first notification said 'Cid Raines, Queen, Stella Nox Fleuret and Rygdea like this'. Hope's eyes widened "Why are people liking this status?!"

The second notification said 'Queen commented on your status'. Hope clicked onto that Notification and read Queen's comment: 'It's Type 0 u fool'

"uuuh, do you think we stand a chance against a guy with magical cards and a guy with like…13 weapons?" Vanille asked sounding nervous.

Fang shrugged "probably not"

"To my house!" Lightning ordered "I still have internet!!" Everyone nodded and ran out of the Estheim Residence. They ran outside to see that there was no quick way to escape.

"Oh damn it!" Sazh cursed. "How do we get out of here fast? We can't ride on our eidolons!"

Lightning came up with an idea. "Odin!" She called out. Odin appeared as soon as she summoned him. He transformed into a horse and stood proudly next to her.

"How come you still have an eidolon?!" Fang asked.

Lightning gave her a small shrug. "Everyone get on Odin! I'll hold them off" She ordered. Everyone nodded and hopped onto Odin. "Odin! Take them to my house" Odin galloped towards Bodhum.

Ace and Noctis ran outside with their weapons in hand. Lightning got out her gunblade and went into fighting stance. "Think you can defeat us?" Ace taunted. "I have magic cards and Noctis has like, thirteen weapons. And what do you have? A gunblade"

Sweat fell down Lightning's face. She had no idea if she could still use her L'Cie powers and she was up against two main characters from other games. "You're right, maybe I can't win" She gave them a mischievous grin and stepped backwards towards the ledge. "Maybe I should just, runaway" she let herself fall off the ledge. Noctis and Ace watched with horror.

"Is she insane?!" Ace screamed.

"I don't know" Noctis shrugged. "Maybe she's planning something"

Lightning fell towards the ground. She clicked her fingers hoping that her anti-gravity device will save her fall, but it didn't. She was no longer in her Guardian Corp uniform but in heavy armor. She started to panic. "It can't end like this!" She yelled. "I'm a main character for Etro's sake!! I must have some new power that could prevent this fall!!"

The random wing that was attached to her outfit started flapping. Lightning looked down and realised, she could fly. She laughed as she flew to the direction of Bodhum. "Looks like this wing is useful for something" She grinned. "Now I know what it's like to be Sephiroth!"

Meanwhile in Final Fantasy VII universe

Cloud Strife and Sephiroth clashed their swords together as One Winged Angel played in the background. Cloud was struggling while Sephiroth was giving him an evil grin but then suddenly the unexpected happened. Sephiroth sneezed and One Winged Angel paused.

Cloud lowered his sword and cocked his head to the side "uh… Do you have a cold? He asked "we can fight another time if you're feeling sick"

Sephiroth faced his long sword towards Cloud "It was one sneeze" He said with a very serious voice "one sneeze will not stop me, Cloud"

Cloud shrugged "if you insist" The two continued clashing their swords as One Winged Angel started up again but then Cloud paused. "This isn't right. I shouldn't be fighting you while you're sick"

Sephiroth lowered his sword and One Winged Angel stopped playing "I suppose" He sprouted his wing "I should go home and rest. Until next time, Cloud"

Back in Final Fantasy XIII universe

Everyone had arrived at Lightning's house on Odin. They were relieved to have gotten away from the crazy guy with the cards and the emo prince. Odin galloped away and disappeared in a flash. "Okay is everyone still alive?" Snow asked.

Everyone nodded and they walked into Lightning's house. It was still the same as it was before, seeing as they were still in the first game. "Why are we in YOUR game?" The unnamed antagonist asked.

Sazh shrugged "well it's not like your game has come out yet Barney"

"MY NAME IS NOT BARNEY!!!" The unnamed antagonist yelled.

"Well then what is it?" Sazh asked

The unnamed antagonist thought about it for a bit "I don't know yet…"

"Since you don't like Barney, let's call you Alan" Hope suggested.

"Hey Alan!" Noel yelled, trying to get the unnamed antagonist's attention. The unnamed antagonist did not respond however. "Alan! Alan! Alan! Alan!" Noel yelled repeatedly.

Hope shook his head. "He doesn't seem to like this name"

"How about Steve" Vanille suggested

"Steve! Steve! Steve! Steve!" Noel called out.

Hope scratched the back of his head "I think responded more to Alan"

"Alan! Alan! Alan! A-" Noel yelled, but was immediately cut off by the unnamed antagonist.

"Why am I stuck with you people?!" the unnamed antagonist screamed

Lightning flew into her house with a proud expression on her face "hey guys!"

Everyone turned around and they were surprised to see her fly. "YOU CAN FLY?!!!" Sazh screamed.

Lightning's eyebrow rose "um…yeah, I have a wing. So, has anything popped up? News wise?"

Fang got onto Lightning's computer and got onto a random fan site "Well…it's mostly screen shots. Apparently Noel's from Pulse"

"Oh my god!" Vanille gasped "So are we!"

"That's cool!" Noel said sounding just as happy as Vanille "I haven't met anyone who was actually born in Pulse."

"Does anyone even live there anymore?" Sazh asked "all I see in that big fat planet are monsters, fal'cie, ruins and trees"

Fang shrugged "I don't know. There must be other people from pulse besides us three"

"Maybe Steve's from Pulse" Vanille said.

The unnamed antagonist raised a brow "you think?"

"Well you're wearing ugg boots so that makes you aus- from Pulse!" Vanille explained

Fang continued looking through the fan site "Sorry Alan you still have no name"

"God damn it" The antagonist yelled.

"okay here's what's going on in this world so far" Fang explained "This is set a few years later…which means Hope must've hit puberty by then"


"You're short and you look like a little girl. You may as well be Justin Bieber Now let me continue" Fang scrolled down the page "Apparently there was a Novel in the Japanese Xbox version showing how Lightning disappeared in the first place. She's pretty much disappeared off the face of the planet but still has Odin, Serah gets a bow and a moogle and she joins Noel to find Lightning since she's in some kind of unknown location. Still no mention of us. Snow's not meant to be jealous of Noel and Serah, in fact he's missing as well."

"What do you mean I've gone missing too?!" Snow yelled "I'm the hero!!!"

"Actually, I am" Lightning explained "see I'm the main character here so that makes ME the Hero. Geez you wonder why Serah went off with Noel" She folded her arms together and sighed "Lucky, I haven't even got a main shipping. Everyone thinks I'm either gay for Fang, Pedo for Hope, about to steal Serah's fiancé or Cid Raines would come back to life as my knight in shining armor, sweep me off my feet and onto Odin and we ride off into the sunset."

Everyone raised a brow at this. "Amazing what Fan Fiction can come up with" Sazh thought aloud.

"Anything else?" Vanille asked.

Fang shook her head. "Most of this is Type O stuff. I don't see why that Ace is complaining. If anything Noctis should be more pissed off about our new game. His game has barely had any work done on it."

"So Snow's missing as well" Serah thought aloud

"Explains why Noel is still breathing" Snow growled and shot a glare at Noel.

Lightning let out a sigh and sat on the couch. "Looks like we're going to have to wait for more information to come out to find out what's going on" she said. "Or Square could hurry up and finish the game"


Oct 9, 2009
LMFAO! oh my god! >XD my sides! lmao are yugi-oh cards really worth it!? and lmao cardcaptor sakura so long ago~ lmfao the sephy comment was just priceless! >XD roflmfao!


Sep 25, 2010
O.O I had no idea Mikoto-Cat had updated! This was hilarious! XD was laughing so hard at the battle scene between Sephiroth and Cloud. Rofl! XD this was great. Wipes tears out of eyes from laughing so much.

Even this was hilarious

'OMFG Ace from Type-O and Noctis from Vs 13 trashed my house' He typed as his Facebook status. Seconds later he got 2 notifications. The first notification said 'Cid Raines, Queen, Stella Nox Fleuret and Rygdea like this'. Hope's eyes widened "Why are people liking this status?!"

The second notification said 'Queen commented on your status'. Hope clicked onto that Notification and read Queen's comment: 'It's Type 0 u fool'


New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you
Chapter 4: we still have Hope

Back in the city of Palumpolum, The other two main protagonists of the Fabula Nova Crystalis series were back at Hope’s house. Noctis was leaning a wall watching Ace look at the sky with disbelief. “Damn! How was I meant to know she could fly?”

Noctis shrugged. “well she does have a wing”

“It’s not like Sephiroth can fly!!” Ace screamed.

“actually he can”

Meanwhile in Final Fantasy VII universe

Sephiroth stood on top of a random building in Midgar, mainly because the authoress had no idea where else to put him. He sneezed once again.

“This cold is getting worse” he muttered to himself.


Ace merely shrugged “oh well, I just found out my game is coming out in Japan in October”

Noctis nodded “good, that means I don’t need you anymore”

Ace grinned in agreement “yeah” he said with a calm voice. His eyes widened “wait what?” Before Ace could say anything else Noctis opened a portal and shoved Ace in it.

“what are you doing?!!” Ace screamed from the entrance of the portal

“I couldn’t create a portal before, that’s why I went along with you” he explained with a more sinister voice than before. “but now that I’m here I have a certain pink-haired bitch to kill”

“I thought you didn’t care about your game not being finished.” Ace said.

Noctis gave him a sinister look “It’s been years and Square keeps pushing my game back. I’ve been sitting here waiting to be complete but all square does is pull more games up their sleeves. They’ve already made 2 dissidias, more kingdom hearts games and now they have a Final fantasy XIII-2. And since TYPE-O is about to be released”

“um it’s type zero” Ace interrupted.

Noctis shot a glare at Ace “LET ME FINISH!!!” he yelled “Since Type O is about to be released I no longer need you” Noctis raised a hand and the portal started to close.

“no please!!” Ace screamed but then the portal was closing in on him “GIVE ME BACK MY YU-GI-OH CARDS YOU BASTAAAAAARRD!!” The portal closed and Ace went back to his own game’s universe.

“pfft who plays with YU-GI-OH cards anymore?” Noctis asked himself and faced towards the direct Lightning flew off in “Now where did they go?”


Hope was busy browsing the internet when he clicked onto a fansite “HEY GUYS! THERE’S MORE INFORMATION!! AND A NEW TRAILER”

“has my name surfaced up?” the unnamed antagonist asked.


The antagonist sighed “damn”

“what’s going on so far?” Serah asked.

“Well, Lightning’s a god-like being which probably explains why she still has Odin, Noel’s from the future and Type-O’s about to come out” he explained.

“huh? i'm from the future…who was expecting that” Noel wondered.

“Not me” Hope shrugged.

“Well, At least with Type-O’s release gets Ace off our backs” Fang said

Vanille nodded in agreement “and since Noctis doesn’t care, we have nothing to worry about”

“or do we?” Sazh wondered.


The gang watched the trailer called ‘Quest for Lightning’. Serah and Noel were quite pleased with their screen time. Lightning and the unnamed antagonist watched it with disbelief. Snow, Sazh, Vanille and Fang weren’t happy as they still haven’t been mentioned once. The trailer ended with the characters questioning their importance.

“Am I even the main character anymore?” Lightning asked “They keep repeating my scenes from trailers beforehand”

“Am I even important?” the unnamed antagonist asked. “They still haven’t given me a name” he shrugged “but at least I’m at the end of trailer”

“Have I like… died or something?” Snow asked. “Because I haven’t been shown once in the trailers.”

“Am I an important character?” Sazh asked “because I haven’t been mentioned once AT ALL”

Hope on the other hand was really excited “YEAH!! OH YEAH BABY!!” Hope cheered “I’M IN THE TRAILER!!!”

Fang shot a glare at Hope “please we only saw one side of your head, your boomerang and an arm that doesn’t count”


Fang smirked “but until we see your entire body, it doesn’t count so you’ll still be a pre-pubescent young boy for now.”

“At least you can still be HOPEful” Vanille giggled.

Hope felt a vain pop “hey! Don’t use my name for puns”

“Well we haven’t been shown in trailers or magazines scans, but HOPEfully we’ll be shown soon” Sazh chuckled.

“Yeah so cheer up” Noel grinned “and have HOPE”

“FML!!!!” Hope screamed.

“Only loosers say FML in real life” Noel said.

Suddenly they heard footsteps. Everyone got out their weapons just in case it was Ace again.

Noli manere,
manare in memoria,
Noli manere,
manare in memoria,
Sephiroth, Sephiroth

“hi guys” Noctis waved casually.

“hey! Where’s Ace?” Sazh asked.

“I ditched him” Noctis explained “he was starting to annoy me”

“Well it’s just Noctis” Serah said “so we have nothing to worry about”

Saevam iram,
iram et dolorem,
Saevam iram,
iram et dolorem,
Sephiroth, Sephiroth

“well good thing you’re here” Snow said sounding happy to see him “our new trailer has surfaced up and we still haven’t been shown.”

“I WAS!!” Hope yelled.

Snow looked down on the boy with a grin “it was only your arm and the side of your head”

Hope scrolled down the page where the trailer was played “well check out these comments”. The gang read the fan comments

‘yay Hope!’
‘omfg I see Hope’
‘Meh I don’t care if Serah ends up with Noel, but at least we see Hope’

Fang’s eyebrow rose. “Just out of morbid curiosity, did you pay those people to write those things?”

“No” Hope growled “They actually wrote those things, I have fan girls”

“sure…” Fang said with no enthusiasm.

Sazh was jumping up and down uncontrollably “man oh man! I really can’t wait for this game to come out” he turned to Noctis who didn’t look like he cared “how do you deal with this anticipation? I mean your game has barely been finished and it’s not even going to be at Tokyo game show.”

“Oh really?” Noctis said “That’s too bad, maybe their busy working on your game”

Ferum terribile

“Yeah and Type-0’s pretty much finished, they just need to release it.” Noel said “I wonder why Ace was complaining about our game when his is almost finished” he wondered “I mean you should be more annoyed, your game barely has any news.”

“yeah I should…” Noctis gave them a calming smile.

ferum fatum

Lightning was starting to get annoyed with the music “okay? What is with that music?!!”

“What music?” Noctis asked

Noli manere,
manare in memoria
Noli manere,
manare in memoria,
Sephiroth, Sephiroth.

“THAT MUSIC!!” She screamed.

“sis, what are you on about?” Snow asked.

Lightning shot a glare at Snow “first of all, don’t call me sis and secondly, don’t you guys hear that?”

“hear what?” Noctis asked sounding just as surprised as everyone else.

Veni, mi fili. Veni, mi fili,

“THAT!!!” Lightning screamed.

“huh? I hear it too” Fang said.

Vanille looked around the room “hmmm I wonder where it’s coming from?”

Noctis shrugged “Oh well it’s probably not important”

Hic veni, da mihi mortem iterum

“hey I can hear it too” Serah said “is it just me or is it getting louder?”

“I’m evil. This is definitely evil music we’re hearing” The unnamed antagonist said “maybe something bad is afoot”

Fang sighed and gave the antagonist a dreamy look. “have I ever told you how hot you are when you’re coming up with ideas” Everyone looked at her with horror and the unnamed antagonist stepped away from the crazy lady.

“well if it’s evil then maybe someone’s about to attack” Noel explained.

“oh please who would attack us?” Snow chuckled. “All of us are good guys, except for Alan who’s meant to be the bad guy, yet he’s hanging out with us”

“that’s because I don’t know why I’m evil yet.” The unnamed antagonist explained. “But I am not going to attack you yet”

‘Well there can’t be anyone evil here” Noctis said with disbelief in his voice.

Veni, mi fili. Veni, mi fili

“has anyone else noticed that the music plays whenever Noctis speaks?” Hope asked.

Noctis scoffed “No it doesn’t”

Hic veni, da mihi...

Fang cocked her head to the side “huh? short stuff has a point there” Hope shot a glare at her

“C’mon guys it’s Noctis” Snow explained “he only helped Ace out because of Yu-Gi-OH cards”

Noctis’s eyes glowed red “That’s where your wrong” his calm look was replaced with a more sinister one. He got out one of his many weapons and faced it towards the gang. The gang were shocked.

“….who knew this was coming?” Sazh wondered.

“I kind of did” the unnamed antagonist said “y’know…villain instincts and all.”

“oh c’mon! You already destroyed my computer!” Hope complained “Don’t destroy Lightning’s house and computer”

“but I thought you didn’t care about your game not being finished” Serah said.

Noctis cackled “oh please” he said “wouldn’t you find it annoying if Square doesn’t go off promoting your game? First I’ll destroy you guys, then maybe some more of those square games in the making, including Kingdom Hearts”


“well if they spent less time creating side games and more time on making Kingdom Hearts 3 they wouldn’t have this problem!!” Noctis explained.

Noel scratched his chin “true”

Suddenly a portal opened from another universe. “Oh great, it’s Ace” Noctis growled. He was surprised to see that it wasn’t Ace that came out of the portal but it was Sephiroth.

“Okay, first Ace comes and bothers us, then Noctis wants to kill us and now Sephiroth comes in” Sazh complained “WHY CAN’T YOU GUYS LEAVE US ALONE!!”

“I’m not here to kill you” Sephiroth explained “I have better things to do than to kill you.

“why are you here?” Lightning asked “you’re not even relevant to the fabula nova crystalis series”

“I’m here to make a complaint” he said as he pointed at Lightning “YOU!! That whole one wing accessory is my thing! And my thing alone!!!”

Lightning raised a brow “what’s wrong with me having a wing? I am a ‘god-like being’ now. I can have a wing if I want to”

“You already took the gunblade idea from Squall Leonhart” Sephiroth explained “why did you have to take that one wing idea from me”

Lightning shrugged “don’t blame me, blame the designers”

“AND WHO KEEPS USING “ONE WINGED ANGEL”?!!” Sephiroth yelled at the others.

Noel pointed at Noctis from a far distance “it was him”

“Snitch” Noctis muttered from under his breath.

Sephiroth got out his katana and faced it towards Noctis. “hmph, so it was you who’s been using my theme music”

“Well it’s not like Somnus is evil enough” Noctis explained.

“Maybe we should fight, but not here” Sephiroth said.

“good!” Lightning said. “I don’t want you guys trashing my house”

Bodhum beach

Noctis and Sephiroth faced eachother. Sephiroth having an evil grin and Noctis staring him down. The Final Fantasy XIII characters were sitting down and watching. Hope was on his phone writing his Facebook status.

‘about to watch Noctis and Sephiroth fight – With Snow Villiers, Serah Farron, Lightning Farron, Sazh Katzroy, Noel Kreiss, Oerba Yun Fang, Oerba De Vanille and Unnamed Antagonist at Bodhum Beach.’ He got a few notifications after that.

Lightning commented “How many times do I have to tell you to stop tagging us in posts?!”

Snow commented “yeah man, we’re about to watch Noctis get his ass kicked!! Oh I didn’t know Alan had fb. Y rn’t we friends? :(

Unnamed Antagonist commented “I’ve had it 4 a while…I’ll add u later”

Noctis got into his fighting stance and so did Sephiroth. Noctis only got one of his weapons seeing as he wanted this to be a fair fight. One winged angel started playing as Sephiroth launched an attack on Noctis. Noctis quickly dodged and rushed in to attack.

Suddenly another portal opened up. Sephiroth and Noctis paused their fightning to look at the portal. This time it was Ace that stepped out of the portal.

“Why are you here?” Noctis asked.

Ace had a confident smile on his face. “I’ve come to get my Yu-Gi-OH cards back”
Last edited:


Oct 9, 2009
lmao hilarious! he didnt even want the cards! xD
XD hope puns! hahahaahha! lol wondering when sephiroth would finally file copyright complaints >XD
lol half expecting leon to pop in after the gunblade joke.

Noctis cackled “oh please” he said “wouldn’t you find it annoying if Square doesn’t go off promoting your game? First I’ll destroy you guys, then maybe some more of those square games in the making, including Kingdom Hearts”


“well if they spent less time creating side games and more time on making Kingdom Hearts 3 they wouldn’t have this problem!!” Noctis explained.
pfft hahahahahahahahahahaah!


New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you

Noctis and Sephiroth stopped their fight. The confident school boy made Noctis cringe. The Final fantasy XIII gang on the other hand could've used their fight as a chance to escape but they didn't. First of all they didn't know where else to go at the time and secondly, this is the fight of the century. Noctis vs Sephiroth, and now Ace has arrived.

Noctis looked a little annoyed as Ace had interrupted his fight "Seriously…you only came back for your yu-gi-oh cards?"

"Well I only gave them to you because I thought you'd help me with my revenge" Ace pointed at Noctis "BUT YOU THREW ME INTO A PORTAL!!"

Noctis chuckled "what's so special about them anyway?"


Noctis got out Ace's Yu-gi-Oh deck from his pocket and sighed "fine if you want them back"

"I came here, not only for the Yu-Gi-OH cards" Ace got out his magic cards, "I've come to kick your ass as well"

"Well sorry but I was already in the process of kicking his ass" Sephiroth explained.

Ace looked at Sephiroth and gasped "S-S-SEPHIROTH?!!!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!!" He yelled out of surprise.

"Noctis used one winged angel" Sephiroth complained "only I'm allowed to use one winged angel"

Ace stood next to Sephiroth "fair enough, mind if I join in for some butt kicking"

Sephiroth shrugged. "sure why not" Sephiroth and Ace got into their battle stances. Noctis was not happy.

"oh c'mon" He complained "That's two against one here. I should at least get a partner" He looked towards the Final Fantasy 13 characters, hoping one of them would help him.

"Screw you!" Lightning yelled "You tried to kill us"

"yeeeeaah!!" Noel yelled. "You have like, thirteen weapons anyway"

Noctis's summoned his thirteen weapons and gave them a confident smirk "you messed with the wrong prince!!!"

Sazh, Vanille, Fang, the unnamed antagonist, Snow and Noel were taking bets on who would win. The Farron sisters on the other hand didn't participate in the bet taking and Hope was too busy browsing Facebook and liking and commenting on people's Statuses.

"Um…why are we here again?" Serah asked Noel "Didn't we have a quest"

"Well you found me already" Lightning answered for Noel.

"QUEST COMPLETED!!!" Noel yelled with enthusiasm.

"Oh yeah and you also gotta defeat Alan or Steve…whatever his name is and save the
future" Lightning explained.

"QUEST…" Noel then had a defeated look on his face "…not completed yet". Noel got onto his phone and checked to see if any news came up about Final Fantasy XIII-2. Hope put away his phone and looked down to see that his hands were glowing. He looked at the others and saw that Snow too started glowing.

"Snow!!!" Hope screamed. "We're glowing!!!!"

Snow looked at Hope who looked almost Angelic with all the light surrounding him and then he looked at his own body. "Huh…so we are…why are we glowing?"

"What's happening?!!!" Hope panicked

Sazh was also panicking. "What do we do?!!"

Lightning remembered something. "Oh yeah…when I appeared in the first Final Fantasy XIII-2 trailer I was surrounded by the same light"

"So was I" Serah said as she also remembered how she changed from XIII Serah to XIII-2 Serah.

It was as Lightning had thought. Snow and Hope were changing to how they are in XIII-2. Snow was the first to emerge from the light. His outfit had changed. His cream coloured coat was replaced with a black one, his red shirt exposed most of his chest and his bandana was gone. It wasn't such a bad outfit but it was something else that made the gang want to burst out into laughter. "Man…what happened?"

Everyone (besides the guys that were fighting in front of them) stared at Snow, most of them were trying to hold in their laughter. They couldn't hold it in any longer as they started laughing.

"WHAT IS IT?!!" Snow panicked.

Fang pointed at his hair. "YOU'RE HAIR!!! IT'S RIDICULOUS"

Snow was feeling the top of his head for his bandana, then it hit him, it's gone "where's my bandana?" He got out his mirror and he screamed like a little girl. "MY BANDANA!!! IT'S GONE!!! AND WHAT'S WITH THIS HAIRCUT!!!!"

"Don't worry Snow, I still love you" Serah reassured to him "even if your hair looks ridiculous" she muttered under her breath.

Lightning chuckled "and they say my outfit is weird. Look at your hair"

Snow chucked the mirror to the ground and it shattered into many pieces "SHUT UP!!" he yelled.

"Uh oh" Noel said "you just broke a mirror, that's 7 years bad luck y'know"

Snow chuckled "there's no such thing as bad luck" Suddenly Noctis dodged one of Sephiroth's attack and his sword almost hit Snow. "AAAAH!!" he screamed

"Whoops sorry about that" Sephiroth apologized and continued to fight Noctis.

Noel smirked "see…"

Snow laughed it off "pfft that was a coincidence" Ace had fire come out of his card and Snow's jacket caught on fire from the flames. "I'M ON FIRE!!!"

"ooops sorry" Ace apologized and continued fighting Noctis.

Noel cast waterga on Snow to stop the flames. Noel gave him another smirk.

"Coincidence" Snow explained until Noctis was thrown towards him. "oww!!"

"Sorry!" Noctis apologized before getting one of his swords and charging into battle. Noel gave him a shrug.

"Coincidence huh?" He said.

"Okay…maybe it might be a little true" Snow mumbled.

Fang looked around and noticed that Hope is missing "by the way…where did short stuff go?"

"Who you calling short stuff?" a mysterious voice said. This young man had silver hair, a yellow and white jacket with a white shirt and teal coloured tie. He also had a brown bag that look like it could hold a giant boomerang, which was a nice alternative to making the boomerang disappear out of thin air after putting it behind his bum.

"deary me" Fang said "He looks like he could be Hope's older brother"

"What are you talking about?" the young man asked "I am Hope"

Everyone was in shock. It only took a few seconds for him to have grown taller, have his voice broken and to not look like that little boy that could be mistaken for a girl.

"H-H-Hope…you've…grown" Vanille stuttered as a blush appeared on her face.

"D-d-did your balls just drop in the last few seconds?" Sazh panicked "YOU'RE VOICE IS DEEPER!!"

Fang whistled as she was checking out the older and mature Hope "your sex appeal went from nothing to 5%"

Hope lost his cool stance and glared at Fang "JUST 5%?!!"

Fang shook her head "Sorry Hun, you're not my type"

"HEY!!" Snow complained "HOW COME HOPE GOT HOTTER AND I GOT RIDICULOUS HAIR?!!! No fair, I'm the hero"

"Oh shut up David Bowie" Lightning said "Hope finally hit puberty"

"DAVID BOWIE?!!!" Snow yelled.

"Yes, David Bowie" Lightning nodded and had a proud smirk on her face.

"Least you got a name" the unnamed antagonist muttered "I'm so sick of not having a ****ing name!!" He yelled "Everyone calls me the unnamed antagonist, dark man, sexy thang, Barney, Alan, Steve, Alan, Alan, Steve, Steve WHEN WILL THEY GIVE ME A ****ING NAME?!!!"

"But you do have a name" Noel said.

The unnamed antagonist looked like his eyes were about to jump out of their sockets "le what?"

Noel nodded "yeah it's Kaias"

The newly named Kaias jumped up and down with joy "I HAVE BEEN NAMED!!! HALLELUJAH!!!"

"Wait…where are you getting this information from?" Lightning asked.

Noel explained, "well while everyone else was too busy watching Noctis get is ass kicked by both Ace and Sephiroth, in Hope's case he was on Facebook -"

"With this sudden burst of puberty, he better not still be going on Facebook" Lightning muttered. She looked at Hope, Who was taking a new profile picture with his iphone.

"Well now that I look different I better take a new profile picture" Hope thought aloud "maybe I'll have more hot girls adding me"

Lightning's palm met her forehead "oh great…now he's become a pervy bastard."

"Anyhow I happened to stumble upon a new trailer and more information...by the way, Tokyo Game Show's on" Noel said showing everyone the fan site on his phone.

"I LOVE TOKYO GAME SHOW!!!" Vanille said happily.

"Oh and the new trailer's out" Noel smiled.

"Let's watch it!!!" Vanille said excitedly.

The gang crowded around the phone to watch the trailer. Everyone was happy except for Sazh.

"okay…they're just being racist here" Sazh complained "they show Snow and Hope but they don't show the black guy"

"Well we're more important" Hope said "you're just comic relief"

Sazh put his hands to his hips "'scuse me young man! Just because you're taller, you're voice broke and fan girls that used to think you're adorable now think you're sexy, does not mean you can have that attitude."

Vanille didn't care if she wasn't in the trailer and neither did Fang. Vanille was too busy drooling over the new Hope. "He's so hot" She mumbled.

Kaias watched the trailer and saw a new character that seemed to have been traveling with him. This little girl had a light purple outfit and the same shoes as Vanille. "How come her name pops up straight away while I had to wait like 9 months to find out my name?"

Vanille looked at Yuru in the trailer and pouted angrily "heeey she stole my boots"

Snow got excited when he appeared in the trailer and pointed at noel teasingly "ha see Noel! I still got Serah"

"What are you talking about?" Noel scoffed "I don't even like Serah that way"

Lightning looked at Noel and rose a brow "how come we know each other?"

Noel shrugged "you probably met me in some other time line"

"And why would I give you a moogle?"

Noel pointed at Serah's new weapon "well that moogle just happens to be Serah's bow"

Serah cocked her head to the side until her bow suddenly transformed into a moogle.

Sazh looked at the moogle and his eyebrow rose "…I was not expecting that"

"hello kupo" The moogle introduced itself.

"AAAAAAAAH!!! IT TALKS!!!" Fang screamed and hit the moogle.

The moogle rubbed its head "ouch! That's animal abuse kupo"


"but it's so cute" Serah said as she hugged the moogle.

A blush came to the moogle's face "aw shucks kupo"

"GET IT AWAY FROM ME!!!" Fang screamed.

"S'cuse me kupo" The moogle said with their hands on their hips "that IT has a name, it's Mog!"

"Mog the moogle?" Snow raised a brow.

"That's right kupo" Mog gave Snow a funny look "By the way they told me you were good looking, what have you done with your hair kupo?"

Snow covered his hair with his hands "IT'S NOT MY FAULT!!!"

Fang cowered behind Kaias. The villain rolled his eyes and said. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you have an irrational fear of moogles"

Fang scoffed "pffft of course not" Fang said as she faked her laughter. But then Mog popped behind her.


"AAAAAAAAAH!!!" Fang hit Mog away.

Lightning sighed. "The great Fang, who charges into battles with behemoths, turns into Ragnorok, Infiltrates Sanctum buildings… is afraid of moogles"

Meanwhile Noctis was still fighting both Ace and Sephiroth and the gang were already bored of watching the fight. "I still want to know what's going on here" Sazh said.

"Well maybe we should go find out what's going on" Vanille suggested.

"Um where?" Sazh asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

Noel suddenly came up with an idea. "Hey, why don't we go to the future? …A.K.A my game's world"

Lightning shot him a glare. "You're game?"

Noel chuckled nervously. "I mean our game"

And so the gang went off to find a way into the world of Final Fantasy XIII-2. Maybe Kaias and Noel may know a little more about themselves, maybe Snow can find out who was the one that gave him the bad haircut and maybe they may find some new characters along the way. But for now, you'll have to wait for the next chapter of this strange fan fiction called 'The Dilemma'.


Oct 9, 2009
lmfao hahahahahaah XD just freaking hilarious!

"D-d-did your balls just drop in the last few seconds?" Sazh panicked "YOU'RE VOICE IS DEEPER!!"
literally laughed my ass off.


New member
Sep 3, 2008
I'm not telling you
Chapter 6: Welcome to Gran Pulse

The gang had abandoned the battle between Noctis from Final Fantasy Versus XIII, Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII and Ace from Type-O.

“TYPE 0!!” Ace screamed at the Authoress. “Geez not even the authoress can get it right”

…As I was saying… They wandered through the town of Bodhum to find the time gate that Noel was going on about.

“So the whole plot of Final Fantasy XIII-2 is that you two time travel?” Vanille asked Serah.

Serah nodded. “It seems so”

“…were the writers on crack when they were plotting this game?” Sazh asked aloud and Fang and Vanille giggled

Lightning rolled her eyes. “You’re just jealous that you’re not in it”

Fang placed her hands on her hips. “scuse me? If it weren’t for Vanille and I, the story would’ve ended at the end of 13. But it’s because we turned to crystal that there IS a sequel”

“You said it sista!” Sazh chuckled.

“She does have a point there” Hope nodded in agreement. “We should be thankful to them for turning into crystal”

“I’m not” Snow said. “I got ridiculous hair and Serah’s traveling with some guy and there’s more fan art and fiction between them than there is with Serah and I”

“yes but Snow, the sequel is meant to satisfy the fans needs” Hope explained. “Btw I have three words to describe why I love this game” he smirked. “I, got, HOT”

Snow rolled his eyes. “No you didn’t, you just hit puberty so fans still think you’re an adorable shota. Oh and are you still using text speak in real life?”

“Oh STFU, I can talk however I like” Hope said.

“Text speak in real life is for losers Kupo!” Mog said.

Fang shuddered. “Why do we have this THING with us?!” she asked.

Serah explained. “Mog here can find treasure, alert us when enemies are afoot and turns into my bow”

Mog nodded and snapped its fingers. “That’s right Kupo! You better get used to me being around ‘cause I’m here to stay”

After all the bickering within the group Noel finally found the time gate. “Okay guys, may I present to you…uh Mog, DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!” Mog summoned a drum out of nowhere and gave Noel his drum roll. “THE TIME GATE!!”

“Cool” Caius said, not seeming amazed at all. “Let’s go in”

Noel looked astonished. “uuh…don’t you want to know what it does?”

“Not really, it’s not that fascinating, we’ve seen more interesting things” Lightning explained. “C’mon let’s go”


The gang had arrived in Gran Pulse. Not much had changed, except for the fact that people were living there now. “Looks like we’re in my game’s world” Serah said, stating the obvious.

“Your game?” Lightning questioned. “Nuh-uh sister, this is still my game”

Serah’s eyebrows furrowed. “But I’m the main character”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!” Lightning cackled. The others looked at her as if she were high or something. Well…if you think about it, she could be. She was acting VERY out of character. Lightning started to calm down “oh Serah” she said and shook her head softly. “Serah, Serah, Serah” she giggled and pinched Serah’s cheeks softly. “Oh you’re adorable”

Caius raised a brow. “That was very…strange of you to be acting like this”

“Yeah Lightning” Serah nodded in agreement. “You were really out of character there”

“hmm” Lightning thought aloud. “I must’ve accidently taken Vanille’s happy pills”

Hope looked around and noticed that two of them were missing. “Where’s Fang and Vanille?” he asked.

Noel pointed towards the crystal pillar that supported Cocoon. Everyone looked where Noel was pointing. They’re expressions turned sorrowful as they remembered how Fang and Vanille sacrificed themselves at the end of the first game to save Cocoon.

Caius let out a sigh of relief. “Well at least I don’t have to worry about Fang groping me anymore” The gang looked at him as though it were strange to have said such of thing.

“Or Fang hitting me Kupo!” Mog chimed in.

“or Vanille talking” Sazh shuddered. “Seriously that girl can talk”

Snow looked towards the pillar. “Shame” he said. “I’m going to miss them. But hey, let’s go find out what this game’s all about”. The group had split up to different parts of this world to see what it’s all about.

Crystal Pillar: Fang and Vanille​

The two Pulse L’cie’s lay in their crystal state. They were unable to move but they could still somehow communicate to each other. “Soo…” Fang asked. “are we going to stay like this the whole game?”

“Yep” Vanille replied.

“So no epic battles, cutscenes, costume changes or character development?” Fang asked.

“Nope” Vanille replied. “But at least we have each other”

New Bodhum: Snow​

Snow strolled through New Bodhum looking at the scenery. “Hey” he said to himself. “Not bad for a town that was only made within a few years”. He explored the newly made town full of people who decided to live on Pulse. He saw four familiar faces, Team NORA.

“Hey guys!” he yelled.

The rebels looked towards their leader and gasped. “It’s Snow!” Marqui yelled happily. They all ran towards him and greeted him.

“Yo Snow!” Gadot playfully punched him on the shoulder. “How’s it going?”

Snow nodded. “Good! What’s up?!”

“Hey Snow!” Lebreau waved. “What have you done with your hair?” Snow looked at the black-haired lady with an unamused expression. He wanted to say something but nothing came through his mind at the time.

“I told you before” Yuuj said; his voice sounding similar to a gay fashion designer. “Stop using that shampoo of yours and use L’Oreal” he flicked his silky blue hair. “It makes your hair ALL silky smooth”

Snow raised a brow. “Why did I let you in NORA?”

Alyssa and Atlas: Serah, Mog, Noel and Hope​

Serah, Noel and Hope took a nice stroll in this currently unknown area. All they knew is that it was raining and they were in some random forest. Noel looked towards a girl with short fair hair and wearing a similar outfit to Hope but more feminine. “Oh my god!” Noel gasped “Hope!” he went over to the girl and shook her by the shoulders “WHY DID YOU GET A SEX CHANGE?!!!!”

Hope rolled his eyes “Noel…I’m right here” he said. Noel chuckled nervously and let go of the girl.

“Hope is that you?” the young lady asked.

Hope chuckled. “See Noel, this is one of my fan girls”

“fan girl?!” The young lady said. “I’m not a fan girl, I’m your assistant, and who are you?” she asked and pointed at Noel and Serah.

“Main characters” Noel explained bluntly. “Who are you?”

The young lady cocked her head to the side “Main characters of what?”

Hope’s palm met his forehead “Oh you poor soul”

Mog shook his head. “Kupo, she does not know about our awesomeness”

“My name’s Alyssa” Alyssa greeted Serah and Noel with a smile.

“Nice to meet you Alyssa” Serah said with a smile “what are you doing here?” she asked.

Alyssa looked mournful and knelt towards a grave “I’m visiting my friend’s grave, she died running from the purge”

“What was her name?” Noel asked her.

Alyssa stood up and shook her head “I don’t know”

“pfft some friend” Hope scoffed.

“If you want I can lead you to Atlas” Alyssa said with a smile.

Serah raised a brow “what’s Atlas?”

Moments later: Bresha Ruins​

A giant creature smashed it’s fist towards the ground and growled. Alyssa pointed towards the creature “That’s Atlas”

Hope’s eyes looked like they were going to pop out of their sockets “HOLY ****”

Mog hid behind Serah as her eyes were just as wide as Hope’s “What do we do?” She asked.

“Will do what any brave man would do in this situation” Noel said as he stood proudly. He faced Hope and gave him a wink and a mischievous grin. “Hope, we’ll leave it to you” He grabbed Serah and Alyssa’s hands “RUN!!!” he screamed as he took the two girls away, followed by Mog who was frantically screaming “Wait for me Kupo!!”

“WUSS!!!!!” Hope screamed. He sighed and got out his boomerang. “This isn’t even my boss fight”

Valhalla: Sazh and Lightning​

Lightning and Sazh took a stroll through the empty city. “Nice of you to join me Sazh” Lightning said.

“Hey not a problem” he said “man this city is so empty, Square could’ve at least put in some NPCs or something”

“Well this is Valhalla” Lightning explained “only important people like me are allowed here”

Sazh pointed to himself “so does that make me important?”

Lightning shook her head “no, that means you’re associated with someone important, making you a guest”

Sazh’s let out a heavy sigh “way to ruin the fun” he complained. Suddenly he heard something approach “why do I get that feeling something’s about to attack us”

Lightning looked up and saw Bahamut flying towards them “because something is”

Bahamut roared and attacked the two ex L’cies. They both quickly dodged but Sazh was in a panic. “AAAAAAH!!” Sazh screamed “WHAT DO WE DO?!!”

Lightning came up with an idea “ODIN!!!” She screamed and the eidolon appeared before her.

Crystal pillar: Fang and Vanille​

“I’m bored” Fang groaned “this is worse than last time”

“Cheer up, let’s play a game” Vanille suggested “I spy with my little eye something beginning with C”

“Cocoon?” Fang guessed.

“Close” Vanille said.

“Crystal?” Fang guessed again.

“That’s right” Vanille said with a cheerful voice “you’re turn”

Random part of Cocoon – Caius​

Caius wandered through the streets and sighed. “Here I am, all on my own”

“Hello Caius” A girl with long bluish hair and a similar outfit to Vanille’s said.

“Oh Vanille” Caius raised a brow “how did you get out of crystal stasis?”

“I’m Yeul” Yeul said as she put her hands on her hips and glared at Caius.

Caius shrugged. “I couldn’t tell, with those boots and the furry thing at the back of your skirt”

“Here’s the difference” Yeul explained “I’m wearing purple and I’m not skipping around like a happy flouncy moron”

“But they totally do not match your outfit!” Yuuj said appearing out of nowhere and using that same tone of voice as a gay fashion designer’s. “Black boots would look sooo much better” he said and grabbed the furry part at the back of her skirt “and what’s with the furry thing at the back of your skirt” he let go of the fur part “pfft that’s sooo retro”

Yeul raised a brow “what’s this guy doing here?”

“Yeah ninny” Caius folded his arms “watcha doing here?”

“I’m just giving you some fashion advice” Yuuj scoffed “peesh you’re sooo touchy”

Caius chuckled “At least I’m a main character”

Yuuj gasped “oh you did not just go there”

Crystal Pillar again​

The two crystals had been playing “I Spy” for quite a long time. “I spy with my little eye something beginning with C”

“Is it Crystal?” Fang said with a monotone voice.

“Wow you’re good” Vanille said sounding surprised.

“That’s because you’ve picked crystal 54 times!!” Fang yelled.

Random Ruin: Serah, Mog and Noel​

Noel, Serah and Mog strolled through new scenery “we seem to have landed in some kind of Ruin”

“I wonder how Hope is” Serah wondered, sounding slightly concerned.

“We did kind of leave him to fight Atlas” Noel explained.

“We left him?” Serah placed her hands on her hips “You dragged me away from the fight” Suddenly a robot appeared wanting to fight the gang.

“aaah robot!!” Noel screamed “Serah…I’ll leave it to-” Noel was cut off from the sound of a giant boomerang attacking the Robot. The Robot broke down and Hope appeared in front of them

“Hope? Is that you?” Serah asked.

“Duh!” Hope said “Who else has silver hair in Final Fantasy” he asked sarcastically.

Noel thought about it for a bit. “Well there’s Sephiroth, Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz, Cecil Harvey, Warrior of Light, Firion, Kuja, Ultimecia, Cloud of Darkness, Vaan, Fuu, Paine, Riku and Xemnas if you’re including Kingdom Hearts”


“Yaag does kupo” Mog answered

Hope shot a glare at Mog “Oh shut up!”

Valhalla: Sazh and Lightning
Lightning kneeled in front of Etro’s throne and stood up epically. “So…what is this place?” Sazh asked.

“This is where my people bask in my awesomeness” Lightning explained.

“WHAT PEOPLE?!!” Sazh yelled.

Lightning placed her hands on her hips “I like to think there’s people in this big fat city!!! It gets reeeaally lonely here”

Sazh walked towards the balcony of the palace “well I guess since you’re the only person meant to be in this city you can do whatever you want” Sazh leaned over the railing “SAZH IS DA MAN!!!!” He yelled “THAT’S RIGHT!!! WHAT? YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME?”

Lightning rolled her eyes. “Oh boy”

Sazh backed away from the railing “whoa it’s really high up there. Why did you come here?”

“To save Fang and Vanille” Lightning explained.

Sazh raised a brow “by coming here?”

“I dunno” Lightning explained “I was in Pulse with you guys and then suddenly this black thing kidnapped me and took me here.”

Sazh merely shrugged and looked over the balcony again “Oh look there’s one person” He leaned over again and yelled “HEY YOU!!! YOU LOOKING AT ME?!!”

“Warrior goddess” Caius said as he grabbed his sword. “Now we cross swords”

Lightning got out her weapon and feathers went flying. “Who is that anyway?” Sazh asked. “This building’s so high and he’s really faraway”

Lightning shrugged “dunno but at least he called me a goddess” she summoned Odin and charged towards the unknown man. As she got closer she realised “Wait Caius? What are you doing here?”

Caius shrugged “I was looking for a fight because I needed to look epic” Lightning leaped off Odin and landed behind him “impressive”

Lightning’s brows furrowed “save it” They both stood up and she asked “Why did you call me a goddess?”

Caius shrugged “you looked kinda pretty from that angle”

Lightning’s eyes widened and a blush came to her cheeks. She quickly shrugged it off and mumbled “Damn fan girls are probably already shipping us together” She then smirked “Fang is gonna be so jealous”

“They won’t ship us as much as they’ll ship me with Noel” Caius explained “Who else is here?”

“I’M KING OF THE WORLD!!!” Sazh yelled from the top of the balcony.

“Just some crazy guy” She said as they both got their swords and prepared to battle.

Crystal Pillar​


“Don’t worry” Vanille Reassured her “you’ve always got me”

Fang grumbled “and that my friend is why people think we’re lesbians”

Unknown area…most likely Cocoon: Serah and Yeul​

“You and I are the same” Yeul explained.

Serah raised a brow “um…how?”

Yeul scratched her chin “well…we both want the same thing”


Yeul rolled her eyes “he’s too buff, I don’t want Snow”

Serah folded her arms across her chest “oh so now you’re saying Snow is not attractive”

Yeul raised a brow “I never said that…never mind”

Back to the Crystal pillar

Fang groaned, “Now I remember why I hated being crystalized”

“Well we can sing a song” Vanille suggested. Now Vanille was a very sweet girl, but when it comes to her singing she could probably kill many dogs.

Fang sounded horrified “oh God”

Fang did not see this coming but she was going to listen to the deafening sound of Vanille’s singing “99 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, 99 BOTTLES OF BEER, YOU TAKE ONE DOWN PASS IT AROUND, 98 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, 98 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL”

Fang screamed “why me?!”

Random part of Cocoon: Noel, Caius and Yeul​

“Caius, he is beyond death” Yeul explained

“You mean Caius can’t die ever?” Noel asked.

“I AM IMMORTAL!!!” Caius cackled.

Noel shot a glare at Caius “SHUT UP!!! I’M TRYING TO KILL YOU HERE!!!”

“You don’t want to kill me” Caius explained, “We might have some kind of fan base out there that wants us to be boyfriends”

“Those are Yaoi fan girls” Noel groaned.

The Future: Noel, Caius and Mog

It appeared as though Noel and Caius had a duel. Noel lay on the ground struggling to get up. “Prepare to die” Caius said as he got out his sword and got ready to stab Noel.

“WAIT! HOLD UP!!” Noel sat up and Caius put his sword away. “You mean to tell me you kill me?!”

Caius got out his phone. “Looks like it, check out the Tokyo Game Show trailer for Xbox 360”. Caius showed Noel the end of the trailer in which Caius stabs Noel in the back.

“So I die?!!” Noel yelled.

“At this point it would seem so” Caius explained. “Hey it’s the ones that die that the fans love”

Noel faced away from Caius and sighed. “This sucks” Mog floated towards Noel and tried to comfort him

“Look on the bright side Kupo” Mog explained. “We’re currently getting more attention than Type-O is”

“TYPE-ZERO!!!!!” a distance voice that sounded suspiciously like Ace’s screamed.

Zero! Zero! Zero!

It echoed through the battlefield and Noel and Caius looked around to see where that voice came from. “We should meet up with the others Kupo!” Mog suggested.



Oct 9, 2009
lmmfao XD hahahahahah loved it~ >.> poor fang lol .
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