A story in three nights.

[Cicero]

A story in three nights: who will believe it?


1

Soft wind,
warm wind,
quiet in its roar.
Pulls me,
lifts me-
my sighed core.
What is it that I want?

My thoughts are
slightly, satisfied.
A thought mine:
silent, needs,
no emotion which leads;
this sweet rain,
this damp care,
which does not spare
me, but I know

that I will rise,
leave the cold,
return like mad,
back to bed,
back to you;
oblivion.

For the comfort that I found,
is not from here,
nor from now,
is but a small, short wick,
which happened to stick,
somewhere in my heart.

2

I stand again,
the second night;
seeing that which I light,
that which I can.
-a cold eve befalls me-

Seeking clouds,
grating, grousing;
layer to layer,
like silent communicator

-s from the wind
are standing around me
whispering of a must,
their origin,
their lust,
is what I get to be.
Can I control,
use this?
Can I fall,
misuse this?

Who will tell me
a difference.
Who will tell me
my insurance
...of desire?

3

Walks through my mind
lead me here,
and here again;
my home of what's been,
and gone again.

Like the street over the hill,
to the right of this place,
this too leads to the devil,
the devils face.

Known/unknown,
it matters not;
'cause just like the lot
they all stretch out
endlessly before me.

Riding on my bike,
through the night ringing
with music alike;
fading into nothing
like a thought,
which suddenly,
forgot who was singing...
to me before.

Proposed a grand lore:
how long will I believe it?

Three nights have passed now.
​

 

[Nutari]

Not bad but im not much for poetry i thnk this is poetry

 

[Cicero]

Not bad but im not much for poetry i thnk this is poetry

Yes, it is poetry...

 

[Lectori Salutem]

I love your poems!!! They're so good... I think I like the first night the best, but they're all amazing!

 

[kairigirl]

I like how they flow easily and so were easy to read (not in the sense that it's juvenile). One thing to be careful about is punctuation. You don't always need to have punctuation at the end of a line.

is but a small, short wick,
which happened to stick,
somewhere in my heart.

For instance, I think at the end of stick, you could probably take out the comma, it doesn't seem to fit. Just one example, maybe do a quick edit and look over the punctuation.

Good job though, interesting to read.

 

[Cicero]

I like how they flow easily and so were easy to read (not in the sense that it's juvenile). One thing to be careful about is punctuation. You don't always need to have punctuation at the end of a line.

is but a small, short wick,
which happened to stick,
somewhere in my heart.

For instance, I think at the end of stick, you could probably take out the comma, it doesn't seem to fit. Just one example, maybe do a quick edit and look over the punctuation.

Good job though, interesting to read.

Well, I use the ',' or a '.' to stop the reader for a moment. When I don't put anything at the end of a sentence I encourage the reader to read faster. Its a simple way of keeping the flow. With your example, if I were to leave out the comma, the reader would go right ahead with the next sentence, albeit I do want him/her to stop there for a moment. Of course, everyone reads poetry in their own tempo, but I do like to...make them read in my own tempo sometimes. =P

 

[Nyangoro]

I really liked the poems themselves. You used good. descriptive words to convey the feelings of the character. I also appreciate the commas and enjambment that I saw.

However, I didn't really get a good feel for the "story" aspect of it, which left me a little confused (given the title).

Nonetheless, these are great poems!

 

[kairigirl]

Well, I use the ',' or a '.' to stop the reader for a moment. When I don't put anything at the end of a sentence I encourage the reader to read faster. Its a simple way of keeping the flow. With your example, if I were to leave out the comma, the reader would go right ahead with the next sentence, albeit I do want him/her to stop there for a moment. Of course, everyone reads poetry in their own tempo, but I do like to...make them read in my own tempo sometimes. =P

Hm, guess in my mind I just always stop at the end of a line regardless of what there is a the end. You have a point at wanting the reader to do what you want them to.

 

[Cicero]

However, I didn't really get a good feel for the "story" aspect of it, which left me a little confused (given the title).

Well, the poem isn't the story. This is how I vision it to be:

It is a poem about someone (myself, actually) standing in the middle of inspiration. The things he sees, hears and feels; the things around them, those are all impressions of stories, ideas for stories, and overall, like I said, inspiration. The person comes back to this place three days in a row to take in everything he experiences and search his own mind and feelings to what he should use and what not. Eventually a story forms: 'Proposed a grand lore'
The sentence after that: 'how long will I believe it?' expresses the fact that a story never ends up like you envisioned it the first time.

tl;dr Its a poem about someone looking for inspiration for a story, not a story itself.

Nonetheless, these are great poems!

For everyone: This is one poem. =P It just has three parts.

And yeah, thanks for the comments everyone! =D

 

[Andillexe]

It is a poem about someone (myself, actually) standing in the middle of inspiration. The things he sees, hears and feels; the things around them, those are all impressions of stories, ideas for stories, and overall, like I said, inspiration. The person comes back to this place three days in a row to take in everything he experiences and search his own mind and feelings to what he should use and what not. Eventually a story forms: 'Proposed a grand lore'
The sentence after that: 'how long will I believe it?' expresses the fact that a story never ends up like you envisioned it the first time.

I would've never guessed that on my own. I always was bad at trying to figure out the meaning behind the words of a poem. They were very good poems, and it was enjoyable to read. I can envision everything so clearly. Great job. :3

 

[Essence of Elegy]

Well, the poems aren't the story. This is how I vision it to be:

It is a poem about someone (myself, actually) standing in the middle of inspiration. The things he sees, hears and feels; the things around them, those are all impressions of stories, ideas for stories, and overall, like I said, inspiration. The person comes back to this place three days in a row to take in everything he experiences and search his own mind and feelings to what he should use and what not. Eventually a story forms: 'Proposed a grand lore'
The sentence after that: 'how long will I believe it?' expresses the fact that a story never ends up like you envisioned it the first time.

tl;dr Its a poem about someone looking for inspiration for a story, not a story itself.


For everyone: This is one poem. =P It just has three parts.

And yeah, thanks for the comments everyone! =D

Wow, man. You were inspired to write a poem about inspiration. I am genuinely impressed, because I couldn't do that. Poetry for me is just spitting out what comes to me (hey that rhymed!)

 

[Cicero]

Thanks. :3

 

[Cicero]

A story in three nights: Two days to compromise.


1

What,
what has happened?
A night lives strong,
in memory deafend.

Could,
could it be just that;
I've waited too long,
that it's lost its wet?

I,
I build these steeples?
Guarding what is gone,
what's rendered me sleepless.

Do,
do me now.
I've lived my song,
but neglected to bow?

Will I catch some sleep tonight?

2

Why,
why is it so hard,
to write about
this second start?

Do,
Do I really?
Have to step out,
this heart so needy.

I,
I love this yes,
uttering such grout.
Controlling this mess?

Love,
love this words?
Make me proud,
control the herds.

(Of) this,
this inspiration;
Will I shout,
and re-enter its mansion?

Will I catch a dream tonight?​

 

[Darkness Princess]

Haven't been around here for a while and I just read this...
Your poetry is really good as always, Cicero.

 

[Bloodgift]

Good work! I like it!!

 

[Cicero]

Thanks you two! =D I was wondering when you got here, DP, lol, you always post in my poetry threads. <33

A bit of background explanation: The two days described in the second poem are in between the three nights of the first poem. In tried to capture the two main things that always happen with myself once I found inspiration. The first day is about when I have inspiration, but can't/won't write it down, either due a lack of will, or something else. The second day is when I' happy with my inspiration and really do want to write it down, but I have to wait till I get the inspiration to actually write ir down. (I see inspiration for a story as something different than inspiration to write. =P)

But yeah, I keep on knitting further on the whole process around writing, which I find a good source. ^^

 

[arvin714]

Hey! I like

 

[arvin714]

Hey! I like

 

[Cicero]

I heard you the first time...thanks, nonetheless. ^^