I never really posted anything about myself, but I'm gonna try.
I'm 21, female, I'm an embodiment of a contradiction. I'm a shy, quiet person, but at times I'm aggressive and loud, it seems I'm a different person. But all in all, I'm pretty introverted but not to the point where I'm a loner. I'm pretty happy with just close friends and family, but doesn't mean I can't talk to others, but that's where the problem lies a lot.
I think I'm sociophobic, but I also think I just have low self-esteem. Let me explain, I don't feel pretty or anything special. I know I have a ton of talents and things that are good about me, but sometimes I don't see them. I felt this way since I was little when I was told this as a kid by teachers and students... and it never left me. No matter how optimistic I try to be and ignore this from the past, I still feel horribly hurt.
I went to my neighbor's wedding and I tried so hard to look nice, I know how to fix myself up, make up and cute clothes, but when I arrived, I felt so ugly. I saw some of the neighbor's cousins, who I hated forever, and I felt so ugly, they are skinny and looked so pretty...I felt ugly.
Not only that, I go out and talk to someone and if they look so nice, I'm so scared to look at them in the eyes...
I thought I got rid of this as a teenager, I thought this was a phase, but it's so sad that an adult woman feels like this... Idk what to do.
I'm sorry if I'm ranting my feelings, but I didn't know where else to turn. Thank you for reading...
I'm 21, female, I'm an embodiment of a contradiction. I'm a shy, quiet person, but at times I'm aggressive and loud, it seems I'm a different person. But all in all, I'm pretty introverted but not to the point where I'm a loner. I'm pretty happy with just close friends and family, but doesn't mean I can't talk to others, but that's where the problem lies a lot.
I think I'm sociophobic, but I also think I just have low self-esteem. Let me explain, I don't feel pretty or anything special. I know I have a ton of talents and things that are good about me, but sometimes I don't see them. I felt this way since I was little when I was told this as a kid by teachers and students... and it never left me. No matter how optimistic I try to be and ignore this from the past, I still feel horribly hurt.
I went to my neighbor's wedding and I tried so hard to look nice, I know how to fix myself up, make up and cute clothes, but when I arrived, I felt so ugly. I saw some of the neighbor's cousins, who I hated forever, and I felt so ugly, they are skinny and looked so pretty...I felt ugly.
Not only that, I go out and talk to someone and if they look so nice, I'm so scared to look at them in the eyes...
I thought I got rid of this as a teenager, I thought this was a phase, but it's so sad that an adult woman feels like this... Idk what to do.
I'm sorry if I'm ranting my feelings, but I didn't know where else to turn. Thank you for reading...