Help/Support ► The story of a Virgin

[Destiny's End]

Well....it's like this. I am a 20 Year Old Virgin. I always thought Sex was a sacred thing to be shared between two people in Love, but now that I'm in College, I just want to lose it already, but there's a part of me that still wants to hold onto it for that special person.

Long story short, I'm starting to think it's not worth it.

I see my friends gettin girls, which I can do too, but they just want to have sex. Most girls look at guys like that and say, "Damn they got Game" and when they sucked in, they just complain about how they got played. Girls look at me and feel sorry for me cause I'm not doin what all my friends are doin.

Like I said before, let's not get it twisted, I can get girls when the time calls for it, but I can never "finish" the job so to speak.

Any comments?

 

[Ace.]

Hold onto it until you meet someone special. You're not missing out on anything.

 

[Taochan]

Honestly speaking, it's not super sacred but I think you should wait for someone who you wouldn't mind remembering forever.
It's idealistic to wait for the perfect person, but it isn't realistic. However, I do believe it's best to wait for someone who is important to you and you're comfortable with. Don't give it up to someone who isn't important at all just because you're feeling like you should just get it over and done with. :]
As a woman, I'm not interested in getting with a guy who's had sex with tons of women. I'd rather have the guy who held out for someone they cared about even if I had prior experience.

 

[loke13]

Lose it. It not something sacred. find someone hot/cute and get it on. Then when you finally do meet that special someone you can teach them everything you've learned

 

[Killa DeX]

If you were a girl i would tell you to hold on to it because to girls it should be more sacred because that is where birth takes place. But since your a guy and horny all the time just get it over with. Just watch out for STDs

 

[The Conquerer]

If that's how you feel, then if opportunity arrives, take it, however, don't lower your standards. We (not necessarily me) will hit anything, which kinda repulses me a little...

 

[impart]

yeah If I were you id wait to find someone who matters. If they are, then the whole thing will be allot less awkward, as you wont be doing it with someone you barely know

 

[Bukkake Sensei]

I want to be sensitive and compassionate here, especially because I see a lot of myself in the person you're describing, but take a few steps back and put it on receive for a second. You're going about this totally the wrong way. We're talking about your life, man. It's not about making your way down a list and checking off the boxes as you go. Go lose your virginity when you're ready for it -- not when your friends are ready for it, not when your hypothetical 'special person' happens to be ready for it, not when college culture dictates that you should be ready for it. This is a decision that you need to make for yourself, and no one else.

 

[LongLiveLife]

If you were a girl i would tell you to hold on to it because to girls it should be more sacred because that is where birth takes place. But since your a guy and horny all the time just get it over with. Just watch out for STDs

I don't even know where to begin. Save for your last sentence, nothing about this even resembles sense. Just as women have sexual needs, too, men are capable of thinking about things other than sex.


Don't lose it for the sake of losing it or out of some male-ego type competition. Don't hold out, either, waiting for the perfect someone to lose it to because she may or may not come into your life. Have sex when you feel ready and want to, and accept that you may not be in love when you do it, and that the girl you lose it to may be different to woman you marry.

[EDIT] Ninja'd by Sam. He's said my thoughts exactly.

 

[Johnny Stooge]

If you were a girl i would tell you to hold on to it because to girls it should be more sacred because that is where birth takes place. But since your a guy and horny all the time just get it over with. Just watch out for STDs

You're just trying to be funny, right?

 

[Oberon]

Sex isn't really anything to rush into at all.

On the bright side if you change your mind, you can get all kinds of fucked up and get laid right? lol

 

[Dogenzaka]

So you're changing your values based on what your friends are doing.
That's mature.

 

[Chuman]

You can only lose your Virginity once, hold on to it for someone that you love, don't just find a girl to screw, try forming a relationship, and after a while with that person that you care about, that is the time that i think that you should lose your Virginity. But that is just my opinion.

 

[scubasteve]

bro i think you should get rid of thy virginity because all it does is make you look like a bitch

 

[Leonard]

First times hold such great expectations for some people out there which probably makes them seem so sacred. But really, it's just sex. Hot sweaty monkey sex. Most unexperienced men don't last too long on their first tries anyway from what I've heard. It's sometimes not as big a deal as you think.
I think it's less the fact if or if not you are having it, but who you're having it with. Even if you lose your virginity to somebody unimportant now, I doubt you'll think of your first night with a truly loved one as less special and worthwhile later on. You might even be able to enjoy it more when you have a little experience.

But of course that's just my opinion. If you want to be extra sure then of course you should wait as long as you need. Just watch out that you don't wait all your life and, in the end, regret the time past by. It basically comes down to deciding what's more important to you.

 

[_EX]

I was like you, but a lot younger. I was a part of a group that got girls and went to parties etc and I did that too but I didnt want to have sex because I was religious.
I had at least 3 or 4 girls offer to have sex with me (these were some pretty attractive women too, maybe it was just me though.) and I had to turn them down. I was sure I was going to wait till marriage but then I become agnostic. I was planning on being a normal guy and have sex when it is presented, yet I just couldnt go through with it. Sex at a party just didnt seem right.

tl;dr I was like you and I understand your feelings.

Now, I am not a virgin anymore. My current girlfriend of 5 months was my first and I knew it was right. I didnt realise until now how personal sex really was and how sharing it with someone I love is really best here. I wasnt nervous when it happened.
We talked while it happened, and I made her laugh as I said some strange things. If you think about it, I would never have been able to have that kind of calm and enjoyable experience with someone I met at party and didnt have feelings for. I would be nervous as to how they are enjoying it, as to what to do when it is over, as to how I would remember this moment in my old age.
Im glad I waited for her, and I would suggest you do the same. Someone you trust is better than someone you dont trust, right?

 

[Ulti]

I am 19, virgin, haven't had a boyfriend ever.

I do not give two shits and I love my life.

 

[Dogenzaka]

what I thought you had a boyfriend....you've talked about him before...

 

[Ip Man]

Go lose it. The longer you wait the higher expectations you're gonna have, and the bigger disappointment you'll be in for when you actually do it.

 

[scubasteve]

hasha abstiencence i tried absitenced once had sex first day of doing abstinecne dont regret it because i have sex a lot my dad even says "son you got it goin on sometimes"